My heart pounds in my chest as I hide behind the corner with my Nerf gun waiting for the right moment to eliminate my cousin. In my mind I think of the heroic actions of Captain Miller in Saving Private Ryan and ask myself “what would he do?” Suddenly I hear footsteps creeping closer, the closer they get the harder my heart pounds, surely he can hear it beating. I finally decide to make my move, as I move around the corner I see his eyes widen in realization that he’s about to be blasted. In a split second it’s over, my cousin had been shot and I had won the war. I hear him laughing and I join in.

An old man rises at 4:30 am every morning. He puts his blue jeans on then his brown leather boots worn with holes from mornings past. As he walks out the door he puts his Red Man chewing tobacco in his back pocket and grabs his truck keys. When he arrives at his garden he grunts at the sight of weeds scattered throughout his crops. Although he picked weeds from the garden the day before he returns to pick them again. He won’t let the weeds win. He’ll return everyday if it means it will preserve the garden that feeds his family.

Growing up I knew that Roger (my grandpa) had served in Vietnam, but I never knew about his service. The only proof I saw of him actually serving was a picture in his house of him in Vietnam that had “Happy 19th Birthday Roger” written on it. I always wondered what memories were held within that picture but was always too afraid to ask. I figured if asked it would bring up too many painful memories. Based on the war movies I had seen the only trauma I could imagine would be the loud crack of guns shooting and blood spurting everywhere. I had never thought about what it would be like to lose a friend during battle then having to go back out into battle the next day.

Roger is very straight up and proud of his beliefs. However for most of my life the only thing he wasn’t straight forward about was his time in the military. In fact I learned most of what I know about his service and his father’s service from my mom and Pat (Roger’s wife). Recently I got to sit down with Pat and Roger and ask them a few questions and ask about what it was like for Roger during his time serving as well as what it has been like since then. When I asked him if he thought there was a responsibility to serve his reply was metaphorical, “You can’t go to a garden and cut the weeds out today and think they won’t grow back tomorrow.” In a deeper more subconscious way I think Roger returns to pick those weeds in his garden because it has been ingrained in his mind that evil is always in the world and must be stopped.

After Roger’s time in Vietnam he returned to his hometown, got married and started his own construction company. The man could (and still can) build anything he wanted. He built castles, houses, restaurants and even the high school that his kids and grandkids would eventually attend. He made a good living for himself, but he wouldn’t let the fortune he toiled for spoil his kids. Any time he was working on a new project in the summer he had his three girls running dump trucks and hauling dirt for him. His time in the military also influenced his style of parenting. His girls were to have there beds neatly made and rooms straight at all times. His middle daughter forgot to make her bed once and Roger took her out of school, took her home and made her make the bed.

As time has passed Roger has begun to realize that no one in our area has really done anything to preserve the history of those who fought in past foreign wars. With this realization has come a sense of responsibility to keep his fellow servicemen’s memories alive. One day, what seemed like out of nowhere to me, Roger just started spawning old military vehicles at the bottom of his property. The random appearance of military paraphernalia has actually turned into a joke between me and my grandma. When I visit my grandma now, I always ask, “What’s Roger up to, Pat?” to which she usually replies, “Who the hell knows Garrett.” Although she replies as if she doesn’t know what Roger is up to, she always knows what his next military project is.

Originally when all of this stuff started popping up I wasn’t sure what to think about it all. Once I started getting a close look at all the things that Roger had brought down into his front yard I immediately gained a deeper understanding of what it was like for the people who served. It’s one thing to see helicopters and humvees in movies but to see one up close and personal is a completely different experience. Seeing the bullet holes that had punched the walls of helicopters and the initials of pilots gives the objects a more personal feeling. All you can do while looking at them is imagine what the men who experienced the hell of war actually went through.

I think that’s why Roger started to collecting and displaying all of this military paraphernalia. I think he realized that the best way to describe what veterans went through isn’t through words but through examples.

During this project I hope to learn about why my family has such a strong military history. Both sides of my family have many people who have served and my goal is to find the driving force behind why my family serves.

An 18 year old kid is tired of his parents telling him what to do so he decides to do the rational decision…join the army. That kid was my dad and he would tell you to this day that joining the army was the best thing that young kid could have done for himself. The military provided discipline as well as give him an opportunity to get a job without obtaining college debt. While in the army my dad decided to be airborne. This made no sense to me, why would you want to jump out of airplanes? His response was simply, “Honestly I liked the hat they wore and you got extra money.”

I always knew that my dad was a paratrooper in the army, “Eighty-Deuce on the loose” was one of his favorite sayings when my siblings and I asked what division he was in. He was fortunate enough not to have to go into battle though I sincerely believe had his number been called that he would’ve gone to defend our country. I remember the first time I watched Saving Private Ryan with him and asking him why Private Ryan wouldn’t want to just rush home, all he replied with was “you don’t leave your brothers behind.” We watched and debated countless movies about war together. We’re still in debate on whether Marcus Luttrell was more of a badass than Chris Kyle.

My father’s drive to serve was originally started by a want to be independent and to make some extra money. However his love for our country and his inherited desire to stand up for what’s right drove him to serve. As a kid in small town North Carolina a lot of people my dad knew joined the army after they graduated high school. My dad also has a strong military history in his family. His great uncle stormed the beaches of Omaha Beach, had a bullet slice through his helmet and graze his head and continued to fight even fighting in the Battle of the Bulge.

This summer my dad and I were fortunate enough to visit Omaha beach and the ceremony for the 75th anniversary of D-Day. Just like with Roger’s military park it is one thing to see the bunkers that the allies faced while storming the beaches, but another to step inside one and witness one first hand. Those men went through hell because they believed in something greater than themselves.

After the events on 9/11, my uncle decided to join the army and my dad started running again. Once our country was attacked a subconscious switch flipped in my dad, my uncle and in a much bigger sense, the country. Just like when a death in the family brings the family together, the country came together in our time of hurt. The country joined together to stand up against evil. To rid the weeds from our garden.

Each interview I conducted displayed the different personality traits of each individual person. While interviewing my dad we muted the TV, he put his phone down and the whole interview felt very formal. The incite that my dad gave me from his interview gave more depth to his side of the family’s military service. Along with his side of the family’s military service he gave me information on what has driven some people to serve in todays military conflicts.

Roger and Pat’s interview was more of a relaxed interview. Although Roger was scrolling through memes on Facebook, he answered each question with as much depth and incite as anyone could give. Roger is unapologetic in his words, when asked about the government he will tell you everything he thinks about them. There were certain questions during his interview about his father that choked him up and left me almost regretting asking them. He displayed a lot of pride in his family and his knowledge of the military. His interview showed a deep sense of intelligence about military service and life but was also very humorous to be a part of. During Pat’s interview I got to experience what it was like to be a civilian during the Vietnam war as well as what it has been like for her to help Roger on his journey in preserving the memories of veterans

An Interview with Justin Clapsaddle

What was it like growing up in small town North Carolina?
Um it was fun, I mean, when we grew up, we didn’t have cell phones or internet or anything like that. So we pretty much just played sports and worked and did stuff around the house that required us to have imagination. We played pickup games in the community, we played football basketball, just kind of hung out with friends and went to school pretty much.

Do you think your experiences there led you on your path to the military?
In the town I grew up in a lot of guys served in the military. There really wasn’t a whole lot of things going on out there. In the town I was in particular, people who were in the grade above me and my grade served, it was just the thing to do. I didn’t really have a clear path on what I wanted to do.

Were you ever afraid of heights or planes as a kid?
No, because I war never really in any planes or up anywhere high, so I didn’t have an understanding of height.

Did the plane crash you witnessed as a kid scare you at all?
It didn’t scare me as much as we just couldn’t believe it. We were kind of interested in what happened.

What made you want to be a paratrooper?
Honestly I liked the hat they wore and you got extra money.

What made you want to switch from enlistment and go to WestPoint?
I just saw that there was something bigger out there. I had a squad leader I truthfully didn’t care for and I was looking for any way to get out of that company. I just Kind of got lucky and got a chance to go.

What were some of your favorite experiences there?
Playing sports, I walked on the football team, that was fun I made a lot of friends that way. Wearing the uniform I took a lot of pride in that.

Did you know anything about Uncle Bob’s service growing up?
A little, I remember my dad talking about my dad talking about him being in the battle of the bulge, but I didn’t really learn about that until I was older. I didn’t really realize the extent of what he did and how he served.

Did you ever think about what it was like for him as a kid?
I went to Normandy when I was 19 and jumped into Saint Maraglese and experienced what those guys went through in the country side of France. After that I started to read more books about it and those guys and just started to realize what they went through.

Did you enjoy the trip to Normandy this summer?
Yeah it was really fun.

Did our trip to Normandy remind you of your service or your trip to Normandy?
In particular Saint Maraglese, the town really hadn’t changed at all.

Do you think there’s a difference between the people that served now and back then?
Probably in someway, but mostly no. The brotherhood is all the same but the reason behind serving is different.

Why do you think our family has a strong service history?
Poverty maybe one thing, ha-ha. We’re not poor but were not super wealthy either. Your sister got the ROTC scholarship, so she wouldn’t have a lot of debt coming out of college and she’ll be set up nicely.

What do you think drove Ethan to serve?
I think Ethan was at a place in his life where he was looking for answers, I think 9/11 kind of changed things for everyone. I went out and even started running again and even thought about serving again and a lot of people were that way. It just made people so mad and people wanted to make things right.

What did you think when you found out that he was joining the army?
I was proud…happy for and excited for him and scared for him.

What’s your next project for the park?
A PBR boat (river boat), I’ve saw a couple of em’ I’ve just never owned one, also so you can see it.

Do you have any big events planned for it?
4th annual veterans memorial. Pat: the 82ndairborne are coming to jump in and were honoring the WWII veterans and their gonna be digging dirt and sending it to France to represent the men who fought in WWII from North Carolina.

What made you want to start collecting everything you have down there?
So people like you could see that things are not free, that somebody paid for it.

Do you think the government has done a good job with preserving the memories of those who have served?
No, no, no…I think the governments fucked up no matter where you put em’. Pat: Quote. Roger: But there’s good gov’t people and there’s bad, they tried.

What did you think when you got drafted? Fears or worries?
…I was thinking go to Canada… but hindsight, my grandad did WWI my dad did WWII, my brother just came home. So hell I thought I better just stand up. The roads there, they took the walk, so I thought I better just stand up and take it too.

Did Paw Paw have any advice?
No.

Did the world seem different when you came back?
Yeah…it was fucked up. We came home, in Seattle, there was a gang of hippies over there, we were egged, rotten tomatoes thrown at us, terrible.

Has your perspective on the Vietnam war changed at all as the years have passed?
No, the perspectives not changed on fighting, my perspective has changed to the point on how crooked our gov’t is. It’s farmboys fighting farmboys. No politicians, same today. War makes money. All those guys you saw on that wall that are graveyard dead, they made the economy go big and create jobs. You’re young enough you gotta get term limits.

What was it like growing up with a dad who served in WWII
With daddy? Super. Unbelievably good. Most gentle easiest person I’ve ever been around. Momma would come in, she’d beat the shit out of us and say ‘you wait till your daddy comes home’ and I’m standing there thinking God daddy hurry, she’s gonna kill us. I couldn’t of had a better dad.

Did you ever get a chance to talk to Paw paw about his time in the military
No…Pat:a little bit at the end you did. Roger: yeah but not much. Pat: he told you about his feet freezing to the back of the truck. Roger: Daddy was in the battle of the bulge, the Germans came in with a white flag wanting the American troops to give up. And the commanders reply was you’re nuts. He said some days they’d go all day long and not eat anything because the mess hall was like from here to McDonalds (about 4–5 miles) so they froze to death walking there and coming back. Evidently he said he couldn’t move his feet, layin in the bed of an ole’ truck, he thought his feet were froze off. He hollered at his buddy, four or five of them in there, he took the bayonet on his rifle, haha, (he chokes up for about 10 seconds) I think what daddy figured out was the bottom of his boots were froze to the side of the truck and he couldn’t move em’ haha. (he pauses again for 5 seconds) They had no nothing, Garrett. I mean they were true grit.

Do you think there comes a sense of responsibility to serve when someone is threatening our freedom?
I think everybody should serve 2 years. Male and Female. It’s an obligation to protect this country, I don’t care if your folks got a million dollars or 10 cents. They need to serve, I think you do, I think Bryce does, everybody. I’m not saying take your ass out there and get it shot off, I think its how you understand your own freedom. You can’t go to a garden and cut the weeds out today and think they won’t grow back tomorrow.

When did you meet Roger?
I was a senior in Highschool and he had just came home from Vietnam.

What was the atmosphere of the town when the draft started?
There had been several boys killed in Vietnam from Cherokee county, so it was sort of nerve racking to the families when their sons would be drafted.

Did you know anyone who got drafted?
“yes. Roger: “clearwater revival, now I ain’t no senators son. See the big wigs they got their kids out. Now the only person around here that was a big wig that went and served that I knew was Roger West, his daddy could of got him out but he didn’t. Now some of the others, I ain’t gonna name em’ but I could. I know some guys that never served a day. Now some way they finagled the system.”

What was it like when someone got drafted?
“I went to church with one of the boys that was killed, his name was Warren Jones, he was probably 4–5 years older than me, but we grew up together, daddy was pastor down there for several years. I remember mom and dad having a meal for him, he was leaving like the next day or so and it was a sad situation especially when we got word. I remember when he got killed, his brother was in highschool and Warren’s fiancé, he was engaged to a girl in school, I didn’t know what was going on, I just heard Sherry crying and saw her walking down the hall and I saw Erwin crying which I thought was very unusual. So I just got the feeling that Warren had been killed or injured real bad or something like that.”

What has it been like being able to help him with Band of Brothers park?
“It has been very interesting, the year that we had the moving wall, it was a lot of work, but it really came home to me during that time. I was trying to get in touch with the members of the families of the boys that got killed and I was asking them if they would speak at our event. I had one guy tell me that no he would not because he had not forgiven the government for taking away his brother. So there’s still a lot of resentment for the Vietnam war but then I also had a lot who agreed to come and speak. It had been very educational for me.”

Have you gained a deeper understanding of what he went through as you do more stuff for the park?
“Roger never talked about his time in the military until about the past 10 years. I have come to a better understanding of some things he went through and I have seen a change in his personality since he has started talking about the military. So I don’t know what triggered it for him to start talking about it, but he has and he started to want to get in touch with some of his buddies. He’s gonna have a reunion September 27th. There’s about 10 of em’ that we found that are coming, there’s one, Richard Bale, when I finally located him he was in North Dakota, he told me that yes he was the right person but he didn’t not want to remember anything and he did not want to be in contact with anybody that he served with. Several of them have died, we found out this year in July, we’ve finally found another one of his buddies and he had committed suicide a year ago the day we got in contact with his sister, and she said that it was because the V.A. was just not helping him with his problems and he was getting flustrated, he had never married, never had any kids. It was just her and her brother and she was up in age and in bad health, she has sent Roger his burial flag, and all of his personal belongings, she said she didn’t have anywhere to keep it. She made a comment to him that really affected him, she said ‘I wish you would’ve called a year ago and maybe he wouldn’t of killed himself’ and that’s been some of the experiences we’ve had.”

1) Both my dad and Roger talked about the value of military service. Roger talked about how during his time he got drafted and how he thought about how his dad and brother had served. He said this motivated him to get over his fears of serving. My dad explained that when 9/11 happened it motivated his brother to serve and motivated him to start running again. I think that my dad’s and uncle’s motivation relate to me because we are still fighting terrorism.

2) Any time I get to talk to my family and their time in the military it always sparks my interest. No matter how many questions I plan to ask I always end up asking more questions than I planned.

3) Some of the questions I asked Roger were tough for him to answer. There were moments during the interview where he would be talking about his father and he would stop and choke up for a few seconds. If I ever do another oral history project I would make sure that he was comfortable with all the questions that I ask.

4) I’m not sure what stories I would tell about my military service, but I would definitely tell about my dad’s time at West Point and Rogers Military Park.

Beevor, Antony. Ardennes 1944: the Battle of the Bulge. Penguin Books, 2016.

Beevor, Antony. D-Day: the Battle for Normandy. Penguin Books, 2014.

Bailey, Beth L., and Richard H. Immerman. Understanding the U.S. Wars in Iraq and Afghanistan. New York University Press, 2015.

Pushies, Fred J. 82nd Airborne. MBI Pub. Co., 2008.