Connected but not Engaged… How Media is Impacting our Children
It is no longer a surprise to see a 2nd grader with the newest I-Phone or the newest tablet or the newest gaming device. This is rapidly becoming the norm. Flashback 10 years, I remember getting my first phone when I was in 6th grade. And even that phone was just an old ordinary flip phone, which I shared with my 3 older brothers. And the social media site called Facebook was becoming poplar for my age group.
Now we have social media apps such as Twitter, Instagram, and Snap-chat. Not to mention all those new texting apps. Now, more than ever, children are staying constantly connected with friends, family, and people they may not even know. They have the ability and accessibility to connect with people from all around the world. Even though their connections may be plentiful, many times they are not meaningful. Even though children are more connected than ever they are not engaging in meaningful face-to-face conversations with friends and family. Throughout this post I hope to shed some light on how media is impacting our children and suggest practical ways we can help our children engage with one another. Before we go any further please take time to watch this video clip:
Pros to Technology: Technology helps kids access information quickly. It allows helps kids learn quickly.
Cons to Technology: Loss of social skills and limited face-to-face interactions.
Parents can help their kids by setting limits to the use of tech.
It is important for children to have face-to-face interactions with their peers, their family and with their mentors or role models. Media is by no means a bad thing; however the overuse of media is bad. A report giving by Common Sense Media shows us on average “tweens (ages 8–12) use an average of six hours a day.” This doesn’t even include the times kids are both texting and watching television. With that calculated in, kids could spend up to 9–10 hours a day using media. Here is what Perri Klass, a writer for the New York Times, has to say about use of technology…
It is important to reflect on how our human connections are being altered by our technological connections. The truth is, we simply don’t know enough about how the frequency or quality of our technology use is changing basic human interactions and behaviors.
Not only is this excessive use of media taking away from much needed face-to-face interaction, but it is also causing kids to become less active. Dr. Benard Dreyer, the president of the American Academy of Pediatrics and a professor of pediatrics at N.Y.U., had this to say about children, “Unstructured, unplugged playtime is very important for all children and especially very young children.”
One thing Michelle Obama focused on as the First Lady of the United States was a program called Let’s Move!. The program aimed to increase opportunities for kids to be physically active, both in and out of school and to create new opportunities for families to move together.
- Active Families: Engage in physical activity each day : a total of 60 minutes for children, 30 minutes for adults.
- Active Schools: A variety of opportunities are available for schools to add more physical activity into the school day, including additional physical education classes, before–and afterschool programs, recess, and opening school facilities for student and family recreation in the late afternoon and evening.
- Active Communities: Mayors and community leaders can promote physical fitness by working to increase safe routes for kids to walk and ride to school; by revitalizing parks, playgrounds, and community centers; and by providing fun and affordable sports and fitness programs.
If we work directly with children at schools, in the church, at a camp, etc. we need to give the children in our care space and time to be active and unplug from media. Like I mentioned earlier, media is good however the overuse of media may be harmful to children’s social development. And as children’s ministry workers, teachers, camp counselors, mentors or parents — we need to lead by example. We see in Titus 2:7 a command for us to be an example… “And you yourself must be an example to them by doing good works of every kind. Let everything you do reflect the integrity and seriousness of your teaching.” With that being said Perri Klass suggests several places where parents and children should refrain from using media…
- In the Bed: Keeping TVs out of children’s bedrooms and bedtimes is an old pediatric recommendation from back in the day when TV was the screen we worried about most. Now we also stress keeping smartphones out of their beds, but many of us as adults also struggle with this imperative, which pretty much everyone agrees is critical for improved sleep and therefore improved health.
- At the Table: If the family gathers around the dinner table, basic table manners dictate no digital participants.
- In the Outdoors: It’s definitely worth picking some outdoor experiences that are going to be screen-free. One of the dangers of carrying our screens with us wherever we go is that wherever we go, the landscape is the same — it’s a conscious decision to go outside and see what there is to see, even if that means losing the chance to take a photo now and then.
- In the Car: This is a tougher one for many families, since screens in the car can be so helpful on long rides, especially with siblings in proximity. But time in the car can also be remarkably intimate family time (yes, I know, not always in a good way). Some of the most unguarded conversations of the middle school and adolescent years take place when a parent is chauffeuring, so it’s probably worth trying for some designated screen less miles.
It can be very easy to just hand a child a device and say ‘here you go have fun.’ However it may be harder to try to play a game or simply have a conversation. Now I am not a parent and do not claim to have all the answers, but I am an advocate for children and believe children need to have a strong role model in their life. We can play an instrumental role in the life of the children we serve or whom we care for. And we can have tremendous influence in shaping and molding children.
Just to review and wrap up:
- Children are spending far too much time on media devices (on average 7.5 hours). We need to encourage the children in our care to limit their use and we need to limit our use of media (which is ironic because I am typing this while watching the NBA playoffs…).
- Children need to engage in meaningful face-to-face interactions with their friends, family, mentors, etc. We can help children out by setting guidelines on when they can use devices and when they should shut them off, and stick with it.
- We need to give children the opportunity to spend time in outdoor settings. Summer camp is a great way for kids to learn social skills, to gain confidence, to grow closer to God, and to spend time unplugged from media and surrounded by nature.
There is no clear-cut answer on this subject. We can agree with the fact that children need to limit their media use, engage with each other, and unplug from media altogether throughout the week.
~Scott Silva
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