Small Groups are Vital
In many ways, I believe we are busier now than we have ever been. With ease of accessibility of information and demands upon our time, there are many expectations placed upon us. We are busy all day, every day, and we only have so much time to devote to things that are important to us because of the additional demands placed upon us. For some Christians, this affects how they treat their gathering together with other believers. Sunday morning is a time set apart for meeting and worshiping. For some, this is the extent of their interaction with other followers of Christ. But is that enough to foster and promote truth growth in faith? Does it lead to spiritual maturity? I believe that additional time through the week devoted to smaller group gatherings is actually more effective at promoting growth in faith.
We are designed for relationships by a relational triune God. He wired us to long for community, for good deep connections. Sunday mornings are a great place for us to connect and fellowship each week, and this day is ideal for corporate worship and listening to sermons. However, Sunday gatherings are not really designed for deep relationships and true intimacy. Small groups that gather consistently around God’s Word and fellowship promote these relationships. When these groups are life-giving and healthy, people are better able to grow in their faith, hope, and love for Jesus Christ.
I am not saying we should not meet on Sunday mornings. This is the one time each week when we gather with others with the sole purpose of recognizing how holy our God is, and how deeply we are loved by Him. As we gather, our hearts are bound together as we raise our voices in song in corporate worship of our Holy God. We are given the opportunity to sit under solid Biblical preaching from someone who has dedicated time in study and prayer throughout the week. This venue is also a place where we can welcome non-believers to join us who might be uncomfortable gathering in someone’s home.
Sunday morning is vital for our faith, both corporately and individually, but it falls short in building the deeper relationships that lead to transformation. What is the layout of your sanctuary? In most churches, there is a larger room with chairs or pews with everyone facing front. For the bulk of your time there, you are looking at the back of someone’s head. This is not very effective in building personal and deep connections. For some, house churches are the answer. For others, an additional small group gathering during the week grants time and space for deeper connections.
We do not merely gather in small groups to supplement our Sunday experience. In many ways, the smaller group settings are actually much more effective at making disciples, or more fully devoted followers of Christ. These smaller groups strip away the Sunday façade and allow us to walk this journey of faith with like-minded believers who can encourage us when we need it and challenge us when we need that. “The aim of the small group in the church is to function as the church” (Grunlan 163). The effectiveness of the local small group is vital for lives to be truly changed by the power of the Gospel.
The bulk of the work of true growth cannot happen in a larger group gathering like Sunday morning. “Much of it has to happen in a smaller setting, a more intimate, safer one” (Cloud 28). True Christian faith is internal, and not limited to external and visible expression. One could consistently attend, and even lead aspects of a Sunday morning worship service, while they may not have a true and vibrant faith in Jesus Christ. Small groups are not a foolproof remedy to this possibility, but it is harder to pretend among those with whom we have a more intimate relationship. The longer we spend with each other, and the more we find out about each other and continue to extend grace, the more trust is fostered in our groups. This takes time and intentionality.
When we take the time to sit in someone’s home, and look each other in the eye, we are developing a bond that cannot happen on Sunday morning. This interaction helps us hear the emotions behind someone’s prayer requests, and look them in the eye and tell them we will pray for them. This is also a great time to follow up and let them know we have been praying for them for earlier requests, and to ask for an update. We can rejoice in answered prayers, and we can continue to pray for those yet unanswered. We can listen to the heart of someone walking through challenging times, and let them know they are not alone. Acts 2 is a prime example of the early church living life with each other day in and day out. God’s Word tells us we should not neglect this discipline (Heb. 10:25).
In these smaller groups, we are able to pull people out of hiding. Isolation is one of our enemy’s greatest weapons against us. Shame and embarrassment often lead to someone separating themselves from fellowship, and our Lord’s heart is compelled to seek and find the lost. In Luke 15, Jesus tells three parables: the lost sheep, the lost coin, and the prodigal son. In each of these, the heart of God rejoices when that which is lost has been found. We are God’s representatives, called to His ministry of reconciliation (2 Cor. 5:18–19). “Therefore, we are ambassadors for Christ, God making his appeal through us. We implore you on behalf of Christ, be reconciled to God” (verse 20). Can this happen on Sunday morning? Of course it can. However, often these times of patient pursuing relationships take time to develop, and trust has to be established for us to be able to fully carry out this ministry.
As a proud Philadelphia Eagles fan, this concept has been playing itself out with the team the past few years, and has ramped up even more since Carson Wentz is more of leader on the team. Recently, Marcus Johnson, a receiver on the team, posted a picture of himself getting baptized in a hotel pool as they were in Charlotte NC playing the Panther (Benjamin). Many players on the Eagles and on other NFL teams have expressed how much these smaller groups of fellow believers helps them grow in their faith.
Life is messy. Are we willing to roll up our sleeves and jump in the mess, or will be stand back in judgment or shrink back in fear? We must be willing to be vulnerable with others, and to realize that as they are vulnerable with us in return, things could get a little messy. However, as we come out of hiding and invite others to do the same, we are able to avoid the fallout of isolation. We must take time to be transparent, and in order to do so, we must develop trust. Again, this takes time and intentionality.
I think it’s safe to say that we have all lost a relationship (or more than one) due to something we did for which we are not proud. Sin mars relationships and often leads to broken ones. However, there is something almost divine that happens when someone finds out something about us that might lead to shame, and they stand by our side and do not run away. We find a deepening bond on this idea that they are not going anywhere. We are in this together. That is the heart of our incarnate God, “for he has said, ‘I will never leave you nor forsake you’” (Hebrews 13:5b ESV).
As we take the brave steps of letting others into our lives, we discover the joy of knowing and being known. When this happens, we recognize that love is the thing that allows this relationship to flourish. “The important needs of knowing and being known are a big part of what it means to love and be loved” (Cloud 202). This will lead to deeper familiarity and true connection. The Bible says that love covers over a multitude of sins (1 Peter 4:8). Love covers and love protects. Love guards. By covering, what we are not saying is that love does not address sin. Love does not say, “It’s okay that you hurt me.” No, it’s not. Love does not justify the sin. Love, because it is love, will actually confront wrongs. It does not rationalize or defend bad behavior. But what it does mean is that it will guard and protect the object of its love. Love provides a safe place, a refuge. Speaking from experience, I need love to cover me. Love protects and guards. It does not gossip or broadcast the shortcomings of its object. This display of love can happen when we have confidence in knowing others deeply and being known by them, and staying together on the journey.
In these groups, we use words like family, community, safe place, refuge. Here you are safe to be human and to be on a journey, because here you find others who are also fallible and en route. The journey of life is hard enough in community, so one should never have to walk it alone. We need others to help us up when we fall, and be willing to do the same. “Two are better than one . . . For if they fall, one will lift up his fellow. . . And though a man might prevail against one who is alone, two will withstand him — a threefold cord is not quickly broken” (Eccles. 4:9–10, 12). The journey of life is hard enough as it is, you should not be walking it alone. Seek fellowship in a smaller group of believers to walk with you. It is challenging, but it is worth it.
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Works Cited
Benjamin, Cody. “LOOK: Eagles WR Gets Baptized at the Team’s Hotel Pool before Panthers Game.” CBSSports.com, CBS Sports, 13 Oct. 2017, www.cbssports.com/nfl/news/look-eagles-wr-gets-baptized-at-the-teams-hotel-pool-before-panthers-game/.
Cloud, Henry, and John Sims Townsend. Making Small Groups Work: What Every Small Group Leader Needs to Know. Zondervan, 2003.
Grunlan, Stephen A., and Milton Reimer. Christian Perspectives on Sociology. Wipf and Stock Publishers, 2001.
