This is Family
Everyone is buzzing about the latest Tuesday night show on NBC: “This is Us.” This show follows a family through the decades and beautifully lets the viewers into the deepest pieces of their life. “The Big Three” are the children of Jack and Rebecca Pearson: Kevin, Kate and Randall. Each week this story line seems to bring its viewers to tears as it pulls deep at the heartstrings without being overdramatic. So what’s their secret? I believe it’s because this is a television show that finally highlights some painfully real pieces of life that most families go through. TV Families these days seem to either be too put together or all disrespect each other. Nothing about the Pearsons is perfect; but everything about it is painfully real. In the first season alone we have seen problems with alcohol and drugs, we’ve walked with a character battle terrible anxiety, another a food addiction. We’ve seen death, adoption, racial divides, homosexuality, and the loss of a baby. We’ve seen adoption, marital problem, marital bliss, sibling rivalry and sibling love. Truly, this show gives us a window of real life that’s still not our life and has everyone tuning into NBC on Tuesdays at 9. Haven’t seen the show? Check out this clip from the beginning of season one, and know that this blog is full of spoilers.
While watching this show, I found myself looking at a family that could be any number of the families I encounter week to week in the local church. I thought to myself, “this is real.” Which I think is truly the point. “This is Us” Is saying “this is the real us.” And as I think about how to engage a family like the Pearsons today, what comes to mind first is, “this is urgent.”
What is the role of the Church when it comes to the family? According to Lifeways’s Family Ministry Resource; the church should be engaging the family in a way that equips, supports, and encourages parents on how to faith train their children. There’s often a belief that the church should be the one to train the children how to have faith; but I believe it’s the parent’s job. I believe the church should be supporting and equipping the parents to help faith train their child, and the parents should be empowered to engage their children in this way. The various Sunday School teachers that children will have over the years will be in their life for a short while; but the family is together for their whole life. They are the ones who will be journeying together in the long run. But when a family encounters a hard trial, the Church should be there to walk alongside of them, provide counsel and support however they can without “doing for” them. The Church is here to join people on their spiritual journey not live out each person’s spiritual journey. But this is urgent- there is an urgent need for the Church to purposefully walk alongside and guide. Especially now, during a culture where parents are raising their children in a world where identity is being put into question, and leadership of our country is being questioned- the family needs guidance and direction from the church on how to raise their children to have a biblical worldview in a time that’s so confusing. This is real. This is urgent.
What would the TV show look like if the Pearson family had the local church in their life? How could the local church help the Pearsons? Do think this through thoroughly, let’s focus on the children of Jack and Rebecca, and break it down by the years of their life we get to see.
As Children:
How awesome the Church could have been for the Pearson family to help Randall as he processed his identity as an adopted child. We know from the show that the Pearsons struggled finding other children who looked like him and knowing how to integrate culture from his roots. The local church could have walked alongside of the Pearsons and provided resources, as well as helped to connect them to other families who could have helped them. That’s one of the special parts of the Church is the community it naturally brings. It would have been nice to be able to network people to the Pearsons. The church also could have walked alongside Rebecca after the loss of her baby and the bonding struggles she had with Randall in the beginning.
As Teenagers:
Plugging the Pearson kids into a youth group would have been so key if the local church was in their life. Being able to help them build friendships, especially as social issues came to a head for Kate and Randall, would have been great, and could have been fostered in an environment such as youth group. It also would have been great to be able to have a stable environment and other stable adults in their life while their parents struggled with their marriage, their dad struggled with drinking, and through grieving the death of their dad. The Church would have been such a valuable asset during all of the hurt and pain that they encountered. The Church could have grounded them in truths of Scripture, while being a safe place to listen, provide counseling, and connect with other ministries designed to partner through hard seasons of life.
As Young Adults:
And “now” in the season of life that’s supposed to be the present, the Pearson kids could greatly benefit from the local church as a stable place where they could build healthy relationships, and be connected into a small group. To do life together with people is key, to have people to rally around them during hard seasons would be huge.
Aside from the obvious, helping people come to Jesus and build a personal relationship with Him; which would be helpful in any stage of one’s life, the church could have been a huge asset to the Pearsons’.
But that’s just TV.
But the Church is not just for the TV family. It’s for the real family.
And this is family. And this is real. And this is urgent. And this is necessary.
So what can we do for today’s family? How can we support our local church “Pearsons.” We can walk alongside of them. We can provide resources. We can connect them with others who have been in the same position. We can help foster healthy friendships and provide leaders and mentors to help be a part of a family’s “village” to raise their children. We can help put people into small groups where they’ll be able to do real life together, and we can be a part of a loving, caring, faith-filled community.
And though the church cannot do the work for the family.
And though they church cannot fix the pain for the family.
The church can walk alongside of the family.
Because this is Church.
Grunlan, Stephen A. Christian Perspectives on Sociology. Grand Rapids, MI: Zondervan, 1982. Print. /.latest_citation_text
Holy Bible: New International Version. Grand Rapids, MI: Zondervan, 2005. Print.
Resources, Lifeway Christian. LifeWay Family Ministry — Tools, Evaluations and Ideas for Your Church (n.d.): n. pag. Web.
“This Is Us.” NBC. N.p., n.d. Web. 27 Mar. 2017.
“This Is Us — The Art of Making Lemonade (Episode Highlight).” YouTube. YouTube, 20 Sept. 2016. Web. 24 Apr. 2017.
