Innoventis

Patrick Bowles worked at a company called Innoventis. The name was a combination of the words innovate and invent. The ‘is’ at the end was for flair, like an orthographic fedora worn to make the subject seem more edgy and interesting. Innoventis was a consultant company. It consulted on things like adding that ‘is’ to the end of a company’s name. Innoventis addressed “market viability”. Innoventis addressed “brand originality”. Innoventis proclaimed on its beautiful website and in its colorful brochures: “…to polish the potential of any business to a winking finish. You’ve worked hard to grow. Now let us help you present yourself so that lenders and partners will easily recognize the terrific investment you’ve created.”

How did Innoventis do this, exactly? No brochure had the answer to that question. But the market for new business was getting hot. Dukeport was booming. The city was becoming a lucrative place for any businessman that could put on the right show to loosen a stranger’s purse strings. That didn’t necessarily mean putting on a suit and looking competent and reliable. Not anymore. It meant excitement, being fresh and current. Even old companies had to be new, new, new all the time. There was no end to the reinvention. Who could know how to manage such a thing? Innoventis knew, and promised sparkling results.

Patrick Bowles had a knack for getting those results. So they sent him out like a mercenary to put the polish on companies, to tighten them up. Often the work addressed perception and allure. But sometimes the work was internal. Sometimes it meant uncomfortable lunches like this one. Take Herman Luther to lunch, the client had said. He’s this department head.

So they were at lunch. But Herman had unexpectedly brought two junior associates for an audience. He’d lectured them all through the entrees and was still going. “Business success takes action. I’m always on the lookout for extraordinary things and unusual ideas and when I find them I have the guts to acquire them.” His eyes went to the bottle of water at the table. It was heavy ornamental glass, some repurposed liquor bottle. “Things like this bottle. So unique.” Herman stopped a passing waiter. “I want this bottle to take home. If I give the reclaim value for it…” he looked. The value was two cents. “I’ll tell you what. I’ll pay you a nickel for this bottle.”

The waiter casually consented and Herman grinned triumphantly. “I overpaid.” He joked, “I’m not much of an accountant.”

The client had told Patrick, do this for us. Axe Herman. Dead weight. Patrick was from the outside. He could explain that it was a result of Innoventis’ assessment. It was cowardly but that meant nothing to Patrick. So they were at lunch.

The waiter poured water to empty the fancy bottle, then cleared the plates so only the full glasses were left with the stacked menus, napkins, a jar of toothpicks and a bowl of mints.

“You know what you can do?” Herman was being so generous with his advice today. “When they have mints you can drop one in the water, and stir it.” He did so. “And it’s like have crushed mint in your water.”

The associates on either side of him seemed to consider this, deeply. One muttered “Aha.”

Patrick guessed Herman was the same kind of table company as he was a department head. He held others hostage with talk. “Do you know, there are things we learn in time doing anything. A person learns what works. He learns what satisfies. That’s a real thing, satisfaction. It isn’t a perception.” He was philosophical now talking about perception. He had a distant expression. “Perception is not nothing but…it isn’t not THE thing.” He had fumbled his proverb. But he knew to just roll on over it to erase it. “Any business is about service. I know when you’re young there is a lot of flash and noise. And if it walks like a duck and talks like a duck it must be…cock of the walk.” Butterfingers again. But then he turned unexpectedly on Patrick. “Work is about a thing, you understand? A real thing. A company like Innoventis thinks the image is it. If the logo is right and the font is good then something is a success. That’s wrong son.” He spoke harshly. “I can tell you. I’ve been telling my colleagues. You’re a bunch of scammers. Thirty years I’ve been doing this. I’ll be doing it maybe thirty more.”

Herman was right about all of it except the last thing. Patrick was used to the assault of skeptic. Actually Patrick believed they were reasonable men. A good business wasa real, tangible thing. But it dressed itself in speculation. And sometimes it was the illusion that paid. It was crude and backward. It was also undeniable. Flash and noise brought the money in. Patrick thought it was fair to doubt, but it was also small-minded. He regarded the whole notion of commerce as a kind of illusion. He did so well with it because he never took it seriously.

Patrick looked back at Herman. “I understand what you mean but I’ll put it like this. When the weatherman says it’s going to rain wouldn’t you carry an umbrella? Everyone would. Is that like trust? That trust is a real thing.” Those young associates looked on dumbly. They were his audience now. “And we have the weathermen all figured out.”

The check came to Herman but Patrick swept it up. “No Herman, we’ll get this. Please. And actually there is something else to discuss…”

Herman took the news quietly, for once.