Predator Politics

‘At least he apologized’ and other ways we explain away abuse and continue a broken system.

I should start by saying I struggled to write this piece because I’m shy (true), I haven’t written under my own name in a long time (really) and because I wasn’t sure I had anything worth saying. Then I thought better of it.

As women with allegations and complaints of sexual harassment and assault in our state capitol come forward, joining the throngs of allegations being made in Alabama, Minnesota, California, and at the nation’s capital in Washington DC, I’ve been asked about my own experience working in politics.

Well, have YOU ever experienced unwanted stuff? Yes.

I mean, more than just unwanted flirting, right? Yes, more than flirting.

What are we talking about? Like touching? Yes, unwanted touching, grabbing.

Fuck, really? Yes, it’s pervasive.

I’ve had this uncomfortable but important conversation a lot in the last few weeks. The conversations I’m having and the larger public dialogue taking place is informing a large group of people who seemingly had no idea.

So, let me be clear: this shit is happening everywhere.

I can tell you how this kind of lecherous behavior has made me feel when I’ve encountered it: Worthless. Humiliated. Intimidated. At work. In life. Because we’re not simply talking about bad behavior, we’re also talking about a system that protects predators by creating a culture of fear. In the insular world of politics, it isn’t particularly difficult to be black-balled. You risk becoming the focus of gossip, losing job opportunities, facing a sudden career end and sometimes effective exile. And the fear of naming names, pointing fingers, is enough to keep almost all of this behavior in the shadows.

Still, every time I’ve had this conversation recently I’ve been surprised by the shock. By the shock on the faces of otherwise thoughtful and sensitive men. By the disbelief and astonishment at the widespread nature of it all. How did they not know?

Because they weren’t meant to. Because the harassing comments, the lewd suggestions, the sly grabs — they all happen when you’re not looking or, worse, when you choose not to look. They happen in empty corridors, under the table in crowded bars, in abandoned conference rooms. But it IS happening. It’s happening daily, not just in Olympia but in the politics of our state and our nation. It’s happening. Over and over again, leaving many in a wake of shame and fear.

And if you think things are getting better, then you should look at what’s happening in the Alabama Senate race where some are actually arguing that electing a Democrat would be a worse outcome than electing a sexual predator.

Still, after friends and colleagues get over their initial shock and express their sympathy, the conversations I’m having make a familiar turn to power and politics. Even here in progressive-leaning Washington State, some are concerned that the newly-won senate majority for Democrats (in the 45thLD contest) could now be in danger if more shoes drop and other legislators are named in allegations that force them to leave office. How will this all affect the very narrow majority?

Here’s how I wish I would have answered this questions when it was asked:

We are talking about sexual harassment and sexual assault. No one should be asking about how we might weigh the greater good or protect the majority. I get it, we’ve all worked hard to build a majority to get progressive things done for the people of Washington State. But a ‘protect the majority’ attitude is what caused this mess. We have sacrificed a lot for the power of a narrow few — in this case we’ve sacrificed the safety and security and dignity of MANY women.

The implication that continued or well-timed silence may be necessary for the greater good is a disgrace. It’s a lie. It’s an apologist’s dilemma, and not one that I suffer from. People, mostly young women, are being abused and victimized by powerful and predatory men in our political system. If those predators get booted from office, so be it. They should.

Sexual harassment and misconduct are not new to politics but until now we’ve been asked to protect our abusers rather than ourselves, and what results is a network of codes and rules we pass along to each other. Don’t hang out with so-and-so alone. Don’t get in a car with him. Avoid X, don’t work for Y. We make lists that we share, we warn each other, we confide in our loved ones and keep our secrets.

It’s a terrible system, and it’s not protecting anyone from anything.

If the majority power is ultimately threatened locally or nationally, for either political party, it’s threatened by the predators, not by their victims. Let’s be clear about that. And victims of harassment and abuse don’t owe protection to anyone or any party. Ever. Period. Ever. Period.

Everyone who worries about the majority for their party instead of the women who have been suffering and threatened, is an apologist. They are covering for a system that has been designed to hush the voices of the disenfranchised and marginalized.

And one thing politicians and political parties do well is circle the wagons. An attack to one is an attack to the whole. But we have to do everything we can to make sure this conversation plays out differently. A sexual attack on one is an attack on the whole, to all of us. We create more victims by doing nothing or letting the dominant ideology of protecting predators and dealing with issues quietly, continue unchanged. We do our future-selves no favors by wanting to just move on, never looking at the cultural norms that allowed this bad behavior in the first place. And finally, litigating publicly the individual incidents without looking at whole systems means we won’t make the kind of progress we need to now. Nothing serves this cause better than a continued spotlight and an organized woke majority.

I don’t want apologies, or litigation, I want allies. I want everyone to agree this shit stops now. I want everyone to stop defending the indefensible. I want everyone to stop victim-blaming, power-brokering, fear-mongering, mansplaining me and other women who speak their truth. I want the political systems that protect predators to crumble and break. And I want new systems to be erected with help from those we have failed.

We write rules in our country. For most of our nation’s history, we’ve written those rules to protect the powerful and the privileged. Our shop at Civic Ventures is in the business of rewriting the rules. And we support completely the work of the women who have stepped forward across the country, and the important steps being taken by women and legislators in Olympia. #Ibelievethewomen #metoo

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