Destiny & Purposes
Do You Question Others For Not Getting Their Degree & Richness By A Certain Age?
Some people have been living a checklist lifestyle that they needed to achieve certain miles by a specific age, and when others fell behind the race, they looked down on them.
How many of you have been asked by your friends or busybodies from your workplace about your private life? When they met you, there would be nothing else, but to ask about your life progression. To them, these were common questions and very normal.
- Do you have a university degree?
- What is your job title? Where do you work?
- Are you married?
- Have you got a child since you were married?
These were some examples people loved to poke their noses into. Thus, some people felt they needed to have all these by a certain age and timespan. Why? So that they were able to stand up tall when being questioned by other people.
When did these questions usually take place?
- New working environment
- When you bumped into old colleagues who seemed nice and friendly, but they wanted entertainment with your stagnant life
- During festive seasons like the major holiday seasons where you would not be able to avoid relatives
I learned not to ask anyone why they had not achieved their wish list by a certain age. Because behind closed doors, or elsewhere, I would not know what went on in their life.
Let me give you some examples of people I met that taught me this.
The Orphan
It began during the Summer Course of 40-days in Yemen back in 2014. I met a girl who lost her dad at the age of 14. And her mom was gone at the age of 18. She cried when she shared that everyone had a university degree, others had a career track, while some others already had stable jobs, and so on. She had none of these.
She married by a choice of gambling hoping that marriage would break the karma to turn life better. So, could you insist that she should already be got her degree by now? No, she did not have a university degree up till now.
The Woman Taxi Driver
In Yemen, again, I met another person who did not get married despite being 64 years old. She worked as a taxi driver in Singapore. She was like me, dying to get the opportunity to study for a degree and graduate. She had the money to pursue her study between her 30s-the 40s, but she was stuck with her elderly in caregiving. Her elderly excused her siblings from financial responsibilities towards her elderly, and she had to bear the costs for everything. Thus, the money she had, meant for her to study, got used for elderly care.
The Singles
In Singapore, I met another man whose age was 45. He had not been married. His other sister was 41 years old. Also unmarried. This 2-people were older than me.
Why were they still single? Many factors took place for them not because of their unrealistic expectations.
- Because of their mom’s expectations and this happened in Asian cultures.
- Because the man wanted his younger siblings to marry first so that he, being the brother, married the last to take care of his parents
- Because younger generations wanted a fast track in life and did not want to take care of their troublesome parents, thus the older ones had to remain single
- Because one of them was under a magic spell that prevented her from getting married
- And another person I knew had a divorce due to magic spells, thus stuck in her life that only time will tell when it is over.
So, would you ask what took them so long to move forward in life?
Sometimes, we do not know beyond what we thought we all knew. It was not because someone had not been trying hard enough. But, most of the time, we grew bitter because we could not beat the system of what we could not control — God.
So, do you question others for not getting their degree and richness by a certain age? Share with me your thoughts.
Recommended Read
I attached this article by Abena Talks because after writing the article above from myself to you, readers, I asked some questions like:
- how would the article be beneficial to my readers?
The article I wrote was not about solutions, recommendations, product development, or spiritual healings. However, what I put across was a form of mindfulness or creating awareness.
Sometimes, our mindset needed change of thoughts how we perceived situations. We might not understand why certain people just remained stagnant. From our thoughts, the person could have done this and that, however we would not understand any better because we did not wear the same shoes.
Thus, before I hit the publish button, Abena’s article reminded me for one thing — gratitude.
Lord, I thank You. May the article reached to people who would know they were not alone if they felt their life stagnant or stuck. We did not know the reasons or messages behind it. Only You know it, Lord. Grant us the serenity to accept things we couldn’t change, and replace it with better than we planned or expected. Give us the breakthrough, Lord. You are All-Knowing and All-Provider. Amin.
