I’m Not Being “Difficult”; I’m a Coeliac
You “can’t be bothered” to deal with my dietary requirements? Imagine how hard it is for me.
In March 2021 I needed access to a copy of my medical record. Of course, I had a specific reason for gaining access to it, but I couldn’t help but be curious about the information inside. I was an ill child, and an ill teenager and an ill adult, so naturally I wanted to try and piece together all the fragmented memories of blood tests, hospital stays and near-death experiences that were floating around my mind. What I didn’t expect, however, was that sandwiched between a series of eczema related allergen tests and severe asthma attacks, was an incorrectly formatted diagnosis: “Coeliac Disease”.
After a brief period of anger towards my GP for somehow forgetting to tell my parents that their then 8-year-old child had a severe gluten intolerance, I began to add the pieces together. Symptoms that I had spent years thinking was severe IBS vanished after a month of cutting out Gluten. No bloating to the point where I look 9 months pregnant, no unexplained vomiting, no excruciating stomach pains. I was finally experiencing what my body is supposed to do. I was finally healthy. I was finally normal.
Well, almost normal.
As Covid-19 restrictions began to ease and I could go out to restaurants with friends once again, I realised that “normal” did not quite fit me. One trip to Wagamama’s was proof enough of that when they insisted the manager serve us to avoid allergen contamination. I understand their worries, I understand the need to be careful and I thoroughly appreciate it, but I suddenly felt difficult. I felt isolated. I felt as though I was causing problems for the staff, who were desperately trying to accommodate my needs. And this feeling only increased when I began to go out with friends more often, or, even worse, go around their houses for dinner.
“Since when have you been Gluten-Free?”
“Is this another one of those diets you’re always going on?”
Or my least favourite question from a family member:
“Is that why you’re fat, then?”
The judgment began flowing in, a waterfall of “supportive” family and friends expressing how difficult I was to cater for. And, the worst part, I understood them. Gluten-free food substitutes usually taste significantly worse than their glutenous alternatives and cost a lot more to boot. Why should they suffer just because I have a problem? I also don’t drink, but I don’t stop them from toasting a glass of champagne or shotting Jägerbombs. But this is different. When we’re at a bar or on a night out, they savour having a sober friend who can help them get home safely and still join in with them on the dance floor with a glass of water in hand instead of a pint. What they don’t savour is being forced to eat cardboard-textured pizza when we order takeaway because one of the options must have a gluten-free base. And, unlike sitting in a pub and not drinking alcohol, when we are at a restaurant I can’t sit around and just not eat. So, when a whole group of six want to eat somewhere last minute and we haven’t had a chance to check any of the local cafes’ menus online, I risk being stuck eating a side salad with no dressing as my main meal.
According to Coeliac Disease UK, coeliac disease affects at least 1% of the UK population, a staggering 683,410+ people. And yet, it is still so difficult to find places that can cater to those with gluten-related dietary restrictions. Even places that boast of having gluten-free options aren’t always easy to deal with. I’ve been to chains like Bella Italia, chains that champion having gluten-free pasta and pizza, only to be told that they have run out of all gluten-free options for the day. Or they have only one or two gluten-free options on the entire menu, and I will be stuck eating the “least bad” option while my friends devour food that is actually nice.
But maybe I shouldn’t complain. It is a first-world problem, after all. The fact that coeliac disease can lead to small bowel cancers and infertility when left untreated doesn’t matter, because I’m just being difficult. Or maybe people should try to understand that this is not a fad diet. Yes, waiters have a right to sigh when I ask for the allergy matrix and family members have a right to complain about my diet, but they need to know it’s for a reason. I didn’t want this, and if your choice was between overpriced cardboard-y bread and seemingly endless diarrhoea every time you have a sandwich, you’d choose to be “difficult” too.
“Bella’s Gluten Free Food” Bella Italia https://www.bellaitalia.co.uk/gluten-free 7 Oct. 2021
“The Cost of Gluten-Free Foods- A Barrier to Compliance?” DINE https://nutritionalevidence.com/news/579/#:~:text=There%20are%20several%20reasons%20for,in%20recent%20years%20(5). 7 Oct. 2021
“Research FAQ” Coeliac UK https://www.coeliac.org.uk/document-library/25-key-facts-and-stats/ 7 Oct. 2021
