Cloud Computing Weekly Digest: September 16

by Joe Kinsella

Many of us in the cloud are pondering the same question. What will come first: AWS re:Invent (Nov 28th) or our backordered iPhone 7s (unknown)? Yes Apple has officially shipped the first iPhone 7s to customers following the great controversy over the removal of the headphone jack. Apple’s head of marketing, Phil Schiller, explained pre-launch why the company removed the jack. “Comes down to one word,” he said. “Courage.” Yes, like Nelson Mandela fighting apartheid and Martin Luther King battling for civil rights, Apple’s incredible courage has freed us from… a universal adapter that works with all our headsets. I hope to see more of their courage in the future — such as paying a fair tax rate in the Ireland, not using a havens to escape US taxation, and most importantly: getting me my new iPhone before re:Invent.

Okay, let’s get started with our cloud week in review.

Oracle Profits in the Cloud

Oracle fell just short of expectations this quarter, with company revenues up 2% to $8.6B. This news was overshadowed by the company’s continued strong growth in the cloud, with revenue rising 59% to $969M. I decided to celebrate Oracle’s success this morning by taking their cloud for a test drive. My goal: launch a cloud server. After setting up an account and submitting an order form (clouds have order forms?), I found myself caught in a recursive sign up loop that ended with the message: “Maximum number of trials reached.” Well, celebration over, apparently Larry was serious when he said in 2007: “I don’t understand what we would do differently in the light of cloud computing other than change some of our ads.”

Taking Note of Google

In a fireside chat at TechCrunch Disrupt in San Francisco, Diane Greene announced Evernote is moving its service, used by 200M users, to Google instead of Amazon. Diane stressed that Google’s cloud offers superior cost efficiency, security, support and partnership opportunities than Amazon. “It is Google’s time for enterprise,” she said. She also added: “And I have three college degrees while Andy Jassy only has two” (okay maybe I made the last part up).

HPE Leading the Pack

CloudTech published an article this week detailing how HPE is leading Cisco and Dell in the “cloud infrastructure market”. I’d like to congratulate HPE for beating Dell and Cisco. I’d also like to congratulate Jeb Bush for defeating Rand Paul and Ben Carson in the 2016 Presidential race. Great work HPE and Jeb!

Huawei Enters the Cloud

Chinese telecom giant Huawei Technologies announced it is taking on HP, Dell and Cisco in supplying equipment for private clouds. Since Huawei is banned from selling equipment in the US due to concerns their hardware provides unauthorized access by the Chinese government and military, the company is making its push in Europe, Africa and Russia. To help Huawei, I came up with some possible marketing slogans:

  • Buy Huawei and get a free backup of your data to China
  • At Huawei, all our products come with free monitoring
  • When price is more important than the privacy of your data, use Huawei
  • At Huawei, we really care about your data
  • Use Huawei because it’s not like our government doesn’t already have your data

New Player in Cloud: Dell Technologies

The new player in the cloud this week is Dell Technologies, the one week old love child of the Dell and EMC merger. After a year of watching Michael Dell’s Machiavellian maneuvers to transform his company, we finally can begin to see what the $74B company can do. For a while there I was worried Michael might have to rename his 1999 biography from Direct From Dell: Strategies that Revolutionized an Industry to Direct From Dell: What the Hell Happened To My Company?.

That’s all from the cloud. For those of you fretting that Apple might remove the headphone jack from our Macs, I’d like to put you at ease. It’s not that Apple doesn’t have the “courage” to remove the jack. It’s just that… well, they haven’t updated the MacBook since 2012. See you next week.

Originally published at