Stop Using Perfectionism as an Excuse

“Perfectionism is a twenty-ton shield that we lug around thinking it will protect us when, in fact, it’s the thing that’s really preventing us from taking flight.”

-Bréne Brown

I am writing this as a self proclaimed perfectionist. I have always been incredibly rigid about my work, from the time I was a young child through the majority of my college career. I was that kid who would sob over a B+, or have a panic attack at the prospect of being 5 minutes late for practice, constantly feeling as though my self worth was dictated by superficial achievements and my ability to impress others. So it was a bit unusual to my family and close friends when I chose to go into a creative field, where there is no clear-cut measure for “success” and so much of your time is spent having your work rejected.

While I have certainly learned to loosen up over the years and develop a greater resiliency towards criticism, I still put a tremendous amount of pressure on myself. Time and time again, I would justify the fact that I wasn’t finishing my creative pursuits, because I was working hard to make things “just right.” In actuality, I was using perfectionism as a bullshit excuse to never complete projects and to never share final pieces with the outside world.

I would spend countless hours making minor tweaks and overthinking the most minute details, without making the work noticeably better or making myself any more or less proud of what I had created. The wheels would be spinning but I would not be moving forward. Every time I would look at my work with fresh eyes, I would find something that could be modified. The truth in design is that there are infinite possibilities and you have to know how to stop yourself from allocating too many resources, for the sake of exploring options and doubting your instincts.

When I sat down and really began evaluating why I wasn’t producing the quantity or quality of work that I wanted to, I realized that the root of my perfectionist tendencies didn’t actually come from my own impossible standards, but more so the fear of being rejected by other people.

Perfectionists are people pleasers. Whenever I would be given a task by an outside party, I would do whatever it took to get the work done and make the client happy. When it came to my own work however, I would procrastinate and crumble under the lack of feedback and validation from other people. I lacked the confidence to put my work out there because I knew that if people responded negatively, I would be solely responsible. I was unable to face the harsh reality that not everyone would like my work, and opted to hide behind this shield of perfectionism, by making excuses for why things weren’t being finished.

I realized that if I ever wanted to find success in the design field, I would have to work harder to change my mindset. Here are some of the realizations that are helping me to stop using perfectionism as an means to avoid putting myself out there.

1. Stop comparing your work (and your life) to other people on social media.

Social media is a great tool for promoting yourself and connecting with other like-minded creatives, but I was constantly comparing my work to the people I followed on Instagram and Dribbble. I realized that it is totally nonsensical to compare myself to others on a curated platform, where everyone is working tirelessly to make their lives appear as awesome as possible.

It is extremely hard to accurately gauge what a person’s journey has been, simply by looking at a profile. Everyone has faced adversity. Everyone was a beginner at one point or another. Everyone has different inherent strengths and weaknesses. On social media you are only seeing a small, idealized glimpse into someone’s life and career, so you need to take it with a grain of salt and focus on yourself, instead of glorifying people that you barely know based on what little information they are choosing to share.

2. Be open and ask for feedback.

By asking for feedback, you are not only taking away some of the pressure of sharing your work, but you are opening the door for making genuine connections with other creative people. People are not likely to interject with their opinions, but when asked, I have found that people are more than happy to provide thoughtful critique.

Working in a vacuum means the only voice you are hearing is your own self doubt. By putting your work out there you are opening the doors for both positive feedback, and constructive criticism, both of which are far better than the paralysis of feeling like your work is never “good enough,” based on your own impossible-to-attain standards. This can drastically improve the quality of your work and bring an element of collaboration that makes the design process more enjoyable.

3. Recognize that no one really cares as much as you think they do.

Humans tend to be a bit narcissistic. When you share your work, chances are that you are drastically overestimating the amount in which people actually pay attention to what you are doing. That isn’t to say that no one cares, but most people have a lot on their mind and are too concerned with their own life (as they should be) to harshly judge whatever it is that you are sharing with them.

If you share something that someone doesn’t particularly care for, oh well! Chances are they won’t even remember it. Where you will really make an impact, is when you consistently share work that impresses people. The key word there is consistent, so you can’t be afraid to put yourself out there if you want to garner positive attention and have people seek you out as a source for quality work and inspiration.

4. View “failure” as a learning opportunity

We’ve all heard this a million times; learn from your mistakes. But how often do you actually forgive yourself for messing something up? How often do you take a step back, analyze your situation objectively, and remind yourself that chances are, this mistake will not matter a year from now? Realistically, it probably won’t even matter a month from now.

You are probably so much harder on yourself than you need to be. You can’t go back in time, so there is no point in dwelling on things that you can’t change. The best you can do is show some resiliency and ensure that moving forward, you will not repeat the same mistakes.

5. Recognize that criticism does not inform your self worth.

Perfectionists want to be the best at everything. So when people respond negatively to something they do, they tend to take it personally and allow it to impact their self esteem in a serious way. What you do, does NOT inform who you are.

Accept that you will always have fans and always have critics. You will never be “the best” and you will never be “the worst.” It’s all part of the creative process, to use your strengths, acknowledge your weaknesses, and continuing to improve as a creative by putting out work and not letting negativity stop you from doing what you love.

I would love to hear your thoughts on beating perfectionism. If you enjoyed please hit the little heart and share. ❤