MY ACT OF REBELLION: ESTHER KOEKENBIER SLOTEMA

I belief in kismet. Each individual can have a strong impact on how his or her own life plays out. Just one note for the record, there are fatal unexpected events that disrupt our life, finding reason in those moments is not what I am talking about.

So, what is?

I am talking about the choices we make based on a growing awareness and understanding of the key moments in our life and how they can guide us on our personal path. To me choosing a direction that feels like it fits, is strongly connected to knowing and accepting of who I am and the incredible value I have and can bring to others.

For a long time, this connection was interrupted for me. From a young age independence was my guideline. Growing up with two older brothers I always felt the need to be noticed by being strong and making sure to not fall out of place. This behavior became a second nature.

Standing out could be achieved by copying others who looked like they were enjoying themselves or having success. My choices where driving by this, although it did not make me feel ‘in place’.

After a few years in advertising feeling like this was a normal state for me. At some point the disconnect became bigger and bigger, I was missing a true connection with why I was doing what I did and who I was doing it for.

Why would consumers believe our perfectly designed USP, how would it really be beneficial to them?

My understanding of “what’s in it for them?” shifted to what it is that they personally need to be more comfortable, happy, better, stronger, more successful. And let me tell you, to me that was not the product or service we were trying to sell.

I noticed that I was very intrigued by human behavior, however in a different way. This made me feel a bit like an outsider in the advertising world. And it made me question myself. “Why could I not enjoy the success we were booking?”

Looking back on this and even writing this down I see that actually standing out or being noticed, to me, is only possible when I choose what feels right for you, to be myself driven by my intention. I started taking small steps on an uncertain path that became clearer for me while I was walking. I took side tracks that not always turn out well or that others could not understand.

What was very clear to me was that I was no longer letting life happen by continuing to follow others. Choosing for my own beliefs and ideas, although they were not very clear yet, felt like freedom. Deciding that “who I want to be = who I am” instead of the other way around.

That shift of focus felt like a relief. It is not about searching, it is about being honest to myself about what is inside and appreciating what is there.

Being an entrepreneur, I can create this space for myself. In programs and trajectories that I develop with others I learn and re-learn what is me. This way of working provides me with the space to feel free from the pressure of frameworks, from (self-)constructed conventions and images, to accept and value what is me, and also important, what it contributes to others.

By finding and discovering, re-discovering, encountering new passions that weave into my entrepreneurship. And sometimes I find myself doing a project that does not really resonate. I now take this as a learning that makes my focus stronger and more connected to my core: helping others to also (re-)discover this inner power to see other people (become) at ease with who they are and find peace, power and clarity from within.

You can read more about Esther at laguacamole.com