Aye, aye, aye, Oh CUBA!
QUE BOLA ASERE MONINA?!?!?!?! COMO TA LA COSAAAAA?!?!?!?! ( I promise I’ll get to some stuff other than language towards the end, just bare with me :) for now.)
Slowly as we move forward and I begin to unravel Cuba (as much as I can), I’m going to dump some Cuban Spanish on you. Haha.
Because:
I think it’d be fun
and
I think it’d be kind of funny… to see if you guys have any reactions to it.
Actually, most of the latin world doesn’t really believe that Cubans speak Spanish. And that is absolutely, totally our fault (I’ll explain soon).
- We cut off half the words,
- we switch “R” sounds for “L” sounds, “V” to “B” etc.
- We cut out “D’s”
- and because most of our everyday talking consists of sayings (that nobody else understands because we use lots of cultural context) we use to mean everyday words.
- More so, the Spanish in Cuba is a mix of Spain Castillian Spanish and languages that have African origins.
- AND
- AND
- AND on top of all that, we speak (not necessarily me because I am a slow thinker and talker in any of the three languages I speak) FAAAAAASSSSST!!!
Anyways,
I think some of these simple phrases and words are the first things you should know about Cubans. Mainly, so you can understand at least un pocitico (a little bit) of what they’re saying.
Below are some examples of what I mean above and phrases and things you can use in your future endeavors (lol):
“Que bola asere monina?” Translates into “what’s up my home dog (or you know, just really close friend.) Honestly, it would be street talk like “what’s up my n*****?”, a word I won’t use because it’s inappropriate in our societal context here in the US. This phrase would not be understood by any other Spanish speaker because this is heavily Cuban slang. This is one of those phrases that is a Spanish African mix.
You would use this in just about any occasion like if you see your best friend or your cousin or even some stranger that you would like to make friends with. This phrase is supposed to be friendly in its connotation and I guarantee you that if you use this on a Cuban (just even try to pronounce it), I promise they will love you for it. They honestly love it when you try to speak Spanish with them, especially when you try their slang because they love laughing so they will laugh at you, but… they also love people who love Cubans and you trying to learn these things makes them believe that.
“El Colmao” is an example of another word. If you speak Spanish, you are probably thinking what the heck does that mean? But here I’ll make it so you understand; the proper word is “el colmado”. Now you know that it means a small liquor/ food store (for my English speakers). Now, to explain why it’s our fault that the rest of the latin world cannot understand us. So, there is this Cuban restaurant in downtown LA that is named this, so me trying to get directions to go to the place, typed in “el colmado” thinking, c’mon, we (Cuban Americans) must know that this is the proper way to spell the word so I’m sure that that’s what it would be found under. After searching for a while and not being able to find it, I attempted the way I knew it to be pronounced “el colmao” (if you say the two versions of the word out loud, I promise you it would not sound the same to a Spanish speaker. Just trust me on this one, for those who do not speak Spanish). Shaking my head and rolling my eyes, the restaurant popped up. “Honestly, this is literally why we can’t have nice things”. But really, this is why it’s our fault that we aren’t understood. We butcher everything and expect to be understood. “ñoooo somo malisimo”. Hahaha (short for “damn, we are bad” and Spanish speakers “ñooo” is our way of saying “coño”).
Other words include “enojao” “mojo” “prestao” “picao” just add the “D” between the “A” and “O” and then you either know what I’m saying or you could actually find the definition in a translator (but you have to add the “D”).
“R” to “L” and “V” to “B”: “ me boy hacel lo que me da la gana ” which is “voy a hacer lo que quiero”. You can start to see what I mean. Try to say these things out loud. It will help.
Last example for now: I heard a Cuban woman (“fresh off the boat” from Cuba haha) talk about “algiel que se mudo su muebles”, I then said to my mom “this woman is irrelevant. We were talking about her teeth being messed up, now she is saying someone moved her couch? What?” My mom then starts laughing and says “ Wow, I haven’t heard that one in a while!” So, “muebles” in proper Spanish translates as “furniture” or “couches”. In Cuba, oh Cuba (sigh), however, it means “couches” or “teeth”. She was talking about how someone knocked her teeth out. Yup. Says it all (shaking my head). I mean how do you get teeth from couch. Aye aye aye, Oh Cuba!
To make a horrible transition…
I want to tell you a story to set up the stage of the period of time we are going to talk about next week. But first, I want to add this blog link ,which gives a snapshot of the history of Cuba because there is no way I’m going to be able to get to all of it. I mainly want to focus on, right before the Revolution of 1959 and after, up until present day.
Here is that link:
I think this guy does a pretty good job in explaining all the history until present day (but just read up until you get to Bautista and then I’m pretty sure I can do the rest), but some of the little things I need to fact check her on because I have read otherwise, so I’ll let you know. https://www.chimuadventures.com/blog/2018/02/history-of-cuba/
I want to talk about some government stuff and things people have gone and will continue to go through in Cuba and hit on the comments from my previous post. This story, I think might set up the stage. I am sure though that you won’t get it at first, but it could be a good cliff hanger until next week: government, censorship, persecution kind of stuff.
My uncle, aunt, and my baba (my dad) in the early 2000’s went to Cuba. My dad was able to go because my mom, aunt and uncle have family in Cuba. The rule at the time was that you could go once every three years to Cuba if you have family that lives there. And since my dad is married to my mom that connection was made available to him.
One night, while they were having a party at one of the cousin’s houses at around 2am, everyone was drunk and having a good time and making jokes. (My baba and aunt weren’t there but my uncle was). My uncle let’s the phrase “me cago en Massao” slip out of his mouth. In Miami, everyone uses that phrase meaning “I sh** (or) crap on Massao”. It’s just an everyday phrase used by the Cubans in Miami when like you hit your knee on a table, for example. However, Massao is the name of one of the original Revolutionaries in Cuba that helped the Castro’s obtain power, although I have never heard or read about him or his accomplishments or aid in the Revolution anywhere. I also think he was dead already before this story occurred. Anyways, shortly after my uncle said that, in the privacy of our cousins home, the police show up and said that they were told by neighbors that everyone in this house are counterrevolutionaries. The police, then proceeded to arrest everyone in the house and took them to prison and said they will be in big trouble. Luckily, my dad, who is a lawyer, told the police that my uncle was a US citizen, so he was released a day later (so immediately for them) after verification. As for the rest of the people in the house, those who were Cuban citizens (and let me remind you, who said not a single word against the Revolution), were kept in prison for much longer. Eventually, they were released. Aye aye aye, Oh Cuba!
Yes, this happened in the 2000’s.
No, there was no threat to National Security.
Yes, this does sound like those weird books like “1984”.
Huh, I bet you didn’t think these things happen in real life.
If you couldn’t tell, I am very against this Revolution because of how it affected my family and my people (which I still haven’t fully shared yet), but guess what I don’t live in Cuba so I can say what I want without having fear to lose my freedom or even my life, in a lot of cases. (I’m really glad I was born in the US and live in a country where we have this right written in our constitution) It means a lot to me and every other Cuban American (or at least 99% of us). This is one of thousands of stories like this. But, eventually we will see that many of Cuba Cubans feel the same way, we do here, about the Revolution, but they just choose to remain silent just to get by day by day.
Next time, I’ll use more facts and what not and not be so personal/ anecdotal for those who care to know about the agreed upon history and Cuba, as it is known. This week was really long and hard for me so I didn’t have much time to find some good sources. But, I’m kinda glad we could use it as a “setting the scene up” kinda thing.
Thank you for baring with me!
LOVE LOVE LOVE,
Laila
