A Moment of Comfort
Never for one second did I imagine I would hear something like this from Emily. I cannot even express how happy I am that she had the courage to tell me, and not just give up on us. While she goes upstairs with her grandmother to get her settled I go into the kitchen to put on a pot of tea. As I look through the cupboards for teacups she walks in behind me.
“I thought Gram would like a cup of tea.” I say as I turn around to face her.
“That’s very thoughtful.” She answers with a smile as she walks into the kitchen and to the fridge to get the milk. Leaning back against the counter, I watch as she sets three teabags into cups and adds a little sugar. Then she stops and looks up at me with a pretty blush. “I’m sorry, I should’ve asked if you prefer to have a cup of coffee.”
Brushing a loose strand of hair behind her ear I say, “Tea is fine.” While we wait for the kettle to whistle I venture, “So I was wondering if you’d mind if I stayed a while and we can talk.” Noticing the fleeting look of unease on her face I add, “Not about anything in particular. I’m just not ready for our date to end yet,” with a smile.
I definitely see relief flash in her eyes at the mention of the word date before she smiles and says, “I’d love it if you stayed. And I really am sorry about earlier.”
Turning and pulling her around to face me, while looping my arms loosely around her back I whisper, “Hey, don’t worry about that. It was just another moment.”
Scoffing, she focuses on a button on my shirt, nods her head, and pinches her eyes shut before saying, “For a split second I thought James was there with us. In the restaurant.” When she pauses I sense she has to get this out so I stay silent until she continues, “It took a second for my rational brain to catch up to the irrational side. Then I remembered he’s still in jail.”
Just then the tea kettle whistles so I say, “Why don’t we get our tea ready and I’ll bring ours out onto the porch while you bring a cup to Gram.”
Smiling she says, “Okay, I’ll grab a blanket on the way out.” While I wait for her to join me I put our tea on the little table, then position pillows on the wicker couch so we can huddle under the blanket together. Just as I sit down she steps out onto the porch and comes right over to snuggle up next to me under the blanket. “Are you warm enough?” I ask as I hand her a cup of tea.
“Yes, thank you.” After taking a sip, she takes a deep breath and says, “I thought after some time had passed that I had my panic attacks under control.”
“Did you get them a lot after you left him?” She lays her head on my shoulder, causing my heart to squeeze in my chest at her continued show of trust, and goes on, “I would wake up in the middle of the night forgetting where I was and that he couldn’t hurt me anymore. There were days when I would have been on a schedule or when it was time he would be getting out of work I would get anxious. I’d get worked up because I knew how mad he was that I left him and turned him in. It took me a while to acclimate to my newfound freedom.”
“I wish I knew what he did to you. But at the same time, I don’t want you to relive it and I’ve a feeling that I would end up in jail if I knew that information and he ever crossed my path.” I say as I hug her a little tighter.
Turning just enough to look up at me she kisses me on the cheek and jokes, “Don’t worry, I would bail you out.”
The vice on my heart loosens a little now that I know she can joke about it. “Oh yeah? Good to know.” I laugh as we fall into a comfortable silence.
“After I had him arrested and his parents came to see us they told us he had done it before. He was in a relationship for a few years and she turned him in too. But then she refused to testify. They made him go to therapy and assumed he was better.”
“A piece of shit like that never gets better.” I say angrily because his father, a police chief, probably knew that.
“You can imagine, his parents were very apologetic and said this time he would do some jail time. His father said even though he lost his job and that would be punishment enough, James still needed to learn a lesson.” She practically spits with a hint of bitterness. “I think he just wanted to save face and not let his son make a fool of him again. The fact that he had a history came out in court.”
“You’re probably right about his father. How long is he in jail for?”
“Considering his history, his lack of remorse and the pictures I had as evidence, my lawyer was pushing for the max, which in this case was five years. He got that because a few of his buddies testified that he had anger management issues.”
“Good for them for doing the right thing.”
Giving a half laugh she says, “No kidding. I thought for sure they would’ve tried to paint me as some crazy girl.”
Laughing I say, “I doubt anyone would have believed that.”
