In The Artist’s Eyes
Over the recent years, art has become somewhat of a friend of mine. Something I can rely on when things get tough, to give me the strength to keep me going and give me a sense of purpose. Art has become not only my way to express myself but also a way to bring myself inner peace, that I tend to lack at times. Art is my way of expression, and the bearer of accomplishment in my life, as well as the creator of my self-worth. It has helped my state of mind in ways I never thought possible and helped me see the world in ways I couldn’t before. In a light that seemed so much dimmer before now.
My life and art seem to have always been intertwined in one way or another. I had artistic members in my family. As I grew older, I developed a passion for art myself. At times I wonder if any of it happened to be inherited, or rather something of that nature. Of that, I cannot be sure. However, whenever I seemed to create something, it made me feel as though I had a sense of purpose. All my life, I’ve struggled with my self-worth. Through art, mainly crafting, painting, photography and writing, I have found a way for myself to feel a sense of accomplishment. I have always had a hard time finishing things I have started since I was very young. This was mostly because of inner struggles I have dealt with for quite a while. When I am able to finish a painting, or print a beautiful picture, the feeling of actually completing something I started made me feel a sense of success that I have lacked for so long. I found myself wanting to complete artwork and then, to make it a reality hit home for me. The overwhelming feeling of completion in my soul, as well as my work, made me feel a sense of that self-worth I had always striven for. From all the obstacles I had in life, so far, I have found something I not only had a passion to do well in, but something I could do well at. This helped me move forward through tough times and helped me get through each individual struggle I had to face. Art brought not only passion but meaning to my life and for that, I am truly thankful.
Creating artwork of my own has assisted me in life on so many levels. It has helped my state of mind more than I could have ever imagined, or really hoped for. Since I was about sixteen years old, I have been diagnosed with different mental illnesses, including bipolar and depression. When I can express myself artistically, it aids my emotional and mental state and my need to release tension, as well as stress and anxiety. Through creating I can do this. There is something so beautiful and amazing about taking a blank slate or sheet of paper and turning it into something masterful. It’s hard to think about a world without art because I have gained so much willpower, and peace of mind from it. The positive effects on my emotional state have been incredible, and I believe boundless. I feel with art as a way of expression I can and will go far. I can see myself leading a life I have always wanted, not created by the emotions in my head, but rather what those emotions can create. I believe this will be the missing piece to my tranquility and success.
Art gives off a beaming light that shines within the darkness of the everyday chaos of the real world. As a realist, and sometimes a pessimist, I tend to see the world either how I believe it is or in a darker manner than most. As some would say, the glass may be half empty. When I use my artistic side, and bridge the gap between one way I see the world and the way I see it through the lens of my camera. I tend to get lost in the beauty of the simple pleasures in life and being human. I feel as though I am royalty, being able to observe something simple like the trees swaying in the breeze or the faces of the people I love, as they smile and laugh. Recently, photography has brought this out in me more and more. Finding the perfect moment with the camera, where everything seems still, and yet in motion at the same time. The moment I snap the picture when capturing the emotions on people’s faces, behind someone’s eyes, or the beauty that lay within the details. You begin to realize just how small you are in a world so big and untamed. Then you understand, you want to keep seeing the world like you do through the lens of that camera every day of your life, and before you know it, you are. I can now see the beauty in things I never gave a thought to before. Like the texture of a piece of fabric, to the shape of a vase and the color of the coffee you drink in the morning. We are given small gifts of beauty each day, you just have to look with the right mindset each day to see them.
Loving art is not something I choose to do, it is a passion that was given and brought to life within me. For me, this passion is an escape from my inner demons and doubts. It has been a feeling of accomplishment in times where I couldn’t finish a thing I thought I could. It was a way to see the world in a new light as a thing of beauty, instead of something dreadful and dark, as well as give me something to strive for as a future career. When times were hard, it made me tough and stronger than anything pulling against me. I can only hope for others that have struggled the way I have to find a way of expression, the way I did with art. That will help them to find a productive way to let out their feelings and deal with life and its hardships. I have to say thank you to all the art programs and what they do for children, teens, and adults everywhere. To you, I am eternally grateful!
