The Weight of Your Baggage
Live long enough and you’ll likely experience some hardship, heartache, and/or heartbreak. Whether it’s the inevitable, like death, or it comes as the result of someone else’s crappy shenanigans, at some point, we’re all subject to being the subject of an action or another person’s action. Many times, we’re left with baggage. What I’ve learned in my near 50 years on this planet is that if there is baggage, most times it’s so heavy, it drags not only its carrier to the ground, it eventually weighs down those around the carrier.
All kinds of relationships can be destroyed or at the very least, stifled by baggage from previous ones. It’s unfortunate, but people allow things from the past to not only dictate their present, but to ruin their futures. Know that it doesn’t have to be that way.
Loss of Control
The abuse that I suffered during the 19 years I was married almost killed me. Mine was not only a loveless marriage, it was was filled with mental and emotional abuse. There were two incidents of spousal rape. The verbal abuse came so frequently that I always found myself in a “braced” stance because I was always prepared to either fire back at him and that mouth or I’d find myself in such a broken position that I’d just shut my mouth and take it.
I had been left a shattered mess. There were so many mangled pieces of what used to be a vibrant, fun-loving woman that I never thought I’d be whole again. The thing I was determined to do, though, was heal and loose myself of the damage he’d caused. Believe me when I tell you that the damage was extreme, but I refused to let him control who and what I wanted to be in the future.
Regaining Control
I get it — you’ve been mistreated, mislead, neglected, rejected, dejected, and out-and-out stomped on. Maybe it happened repeatedly. Maybe it only happened once, but that one time was enough to bend your psyche completely out of shape. Regardless of the number of times it happened or how harsh the treatment was, it’s in the past. That person may have had complete control over you from stem to sternum back then, but it’s a new day. You are in control of yourself. That’s such a simple statement, but the fact is many people aren’t even aware that they’ve given their control to another person merely because they are hanging on to and carrying around baggage from their time with that person. Don’t do that.
I know, I know — you’re angry, you’re hurt, you’re lots of things. It’s perfectly fine to feel all those things. What’s not fine, though, is wallowing in those things and allowing them to take over who you are. Release those negative feelings and most importantly, release the person who caused them. I know it’s easier said than done, but the decision to drop those feelings that have a tendency to hold you down as well as dropping that baggage will make all the difference in the world.
You owe it to yourself and those you love to live a life of emotional and mental freedom. No one deserves the right to hold your mind, thoughts, and actions hostage. Release, my friend, release.
