The Exact Approach I Used To Beat 4 Years of Clinical Depression
No, you don’t need to take anti-depressants forever
How It started :
I was diagnosed with depression in 2021, although I think it started way back in 2017 when I basically started losing interest in studies and was also going through a breakup at that time.
Going through days was a constant struggle and each day was a replica of any other; I would sleep at 4:00 am every day and would wake up in the afternoon and even struggle to take a bath. I wasn’t eating how a normal healthy person would do; I was eating loads of sugar and needed coffee to stay awake during the days, while at night, it was a struggle to go to bed. I eventually failed my high school exams, and I started seeing myself as a loser.
There was something wrong with me, or at least I thought there was, so I tried to fix myself through various self-improvement methods, and I would keep making plans and fail at all of them, which made things worse. But now I understand that it was not all my fault after all. I was trying my best, but it was my brain or how it had become that it was hard to get out of the cycles it had created.
People think of depression as staying in bed all day and crying and not eating at all; yes, major depression/trauma can make you do that too. However, even if you can do routine tasks and live normally, you could still be going through depression without even realizing it.
How I came to the realization?
The year 2021 is when I realized what I had been going through for the last 3–4 years. For the last few years, I was escaping things that mattered in Life while wasting my time chasing short-term pleasures. Poor habits had ruined my brain chemistry.
16th of July 2021 — I still remember the date, I was at my cousin’s house in a different city, and I suddenly started feeling a bit uncomfortable. I felt a tightness in my chest area; it was as if I could not breathe, and my stomach was feeling extremely bloated. It felt like I would die, but maybe I wanted to; due to all that I was going through for a couple of years, Life has become a painful experience.
I saw the doctor the next day, and I was diagnosed with Gastroesophageal reflux disease ( cause of my bullshit eating habits), but still there was something strange and scary, I was not able to breathe properly. I had to get a CT scan done to see if my lungs were functioning properly, and the report came, and thankfully, everything was normal.
I could not breathe because of my anxiety; although I had felt anxious before, it had gone on to another level this time, and I desperately needed any help. My family doctor recommended I see a therapist, I was hesitant at first, but my mother insisted, so I had to go.
Going to therapy changed everything for me, Mr. Verma ( my therapist) asked me what happened, and I broke down and explained to him whatever the fuck I was going through at the time. I told him everything (literally everything) and was diagnosed with intermediate ( a level above mild) depression along with anxiety and was prescribed anti-depressants and a few vitamin tests.
I took the medicines and felt a lot better but obviously, I couldn’t take them forever; anti-depressants got me out of the depressive cycle to the point that I could start my journey towards a better life.
How to know if you are struggling with depression?
(Disclaimer:- I am only sharing my personal experiences, although most of the things I am going to be sharing with you is backed by research; however, it’s better to consult an expert and do your own research before implementing anything into your life)
There are a few things that people with mental health issues generally that can help you know if you are going through the same:-
- Your Eating Habits:- Every person going through some kind of mental issue has abnormal or irregular eating habits such as eating a lot or eating significantly less, otherwise craving a particular food item. I used to crave a lot of carbs and sugary foods. It’s very typical to crave sugary foods since sugar stimulates our minds, but I wanted it as if it was oxygen.
Some questions that can help you analyze your eating habits:-
- How does your eating routine compare with others?
- Do you crave anything in particular?
- Are you consistent with your meals, or do you binge eat, or do you eat very little?
Answer to these questions will give you an idea of what’s going on in your mind, and you could also match your diet with other people to get an idea.
2. Difficulty in performing basic routine tasks:-There was a time when I would lay in my bed all day long and not want to do anything. I used to struggle to brush my teeth and comb my hair. These simple daily routine tasks used to feel like climbing a mountain. If you also face such problems for a long time, then it’s not your laziness.
3. Trying to fix things that are not broken:- Depression and anxiety make you think that something is wrong with you physically and mentally. I thought I should not be eating the way I am or I should completely stop using social media, I was in a delusion that just by doing this my life is gonna be better. Now when I look back, I realize it was all normal and it was my anxiety that made me act in such a way.
4. Overreaction to the everyday problems:- I wasted around 1000$ by getting myself tested for various health issues, which I thought I had, but later it turned out I didn’t. If I were feeling a bit of pain in my chest, I thought I would get a heart attack; If it was normal stomach pain, I got myself tested for kidney stones and blah blah. You might think I am crazy, and even I do now, but that’s what anxiety makes you do; it makes you want to freak out even by little things.
The approach I used to overcome it all:-
Seeking Help
- The most common reason people are afraid of going to therapy is that they think it will make them seem weak or believe they will have to eat antidepressants forever.
- Asking for help does not make you weak, but it shows that you are strong enough to seek help, and no, you don’t have to take antidepressants forever.
- Antidepressants are prescribed to increase your brain’s happy hormones ( serotonin) to stabilize your mood — You can stop taking them after a few weeks or months.
- Therapy is not the only way to seek help; you could also ask for help from your family or close friends and tell them how you feel. Trying to do everything by yourself is what many people do wrong.
Changing Environment
- You can’t keep doing the same things and expect your life to change. To start changing yourself, first change your environment, by which I mean changing how, where and who you live with.
- Moving to a different city substantially impacted how I approached life. It made me believe how endless the possibilities are and that you can always better yourself and your life by staying committed and working hard.
- I know it’s not possible for everyone to move to a different place. However, you could still implement changes by redecorating your room, cutting out toxic people from your life, and introducing positive habits into your life.
Eating Better ( Not the traditional eating advice)
- By eating better, I don’t mean the typical advice that includes giving up on junk food and eating bland salad and grass. I have even tried that, and it made me more depressed.
- Your body demands every kind of food, so cutting out a particular type of food forever is not the way to a healthy body. It’s all about eating a balanced and consistent diet.
- Rather than cutting out on all the junk food and eating only a handful of stuff. Make a list of foods that stimulates your mind and body and stop consuming them. For example, coffee makes me feel more anxious, and bread causes indigestion in my stomach, so I have stopped consuming these, but apart from them, I eat everything but as I said, in a balanced way.
Determining your Work Capacity and Setting Goals Accordingly
- Again, not the traditional advice of setting goals beyond your capacity to push and achieve more. There is nothing wrong with setting enormous goals for yourself, but it’s also essential to understand your current ability and set goals accordingly.
- What I mean by realistic goals; you set goals just one level beyond your current capacity. For example, if you currently wake up at around 11:00 in the morning, rather than forcing yourself to wake up at 5:00 or 6:00 am, try to wake up at 10:00 and sleep one hour earlier.
- It’s like playing video games; as you keep playing, you get bigger targets, but achieving them does not seem impossible since you have developed that capacity by accomplishing smaller targets. Similarly, You can continue to increase your goals as you increase your work capacity.
Treating the chemical imbalance in your brain-
- Doctors or researchers suggest that depression and anxiety are a result of some sort of chemical imbalance in your brain caused by a lack of vital vitamins and other nutritious components. This is true, but still, depression can also be caused by some sort of trauma or different profoundly impacting experiences in life.
- How to get the brain chemistry right? — To get things right, it’s essential to know what’s wrong. I wouldn’t recommend wasting loads of money and getting tested for every single vitamin or mineral deficiency.
- I would recommend you to get tested for 1. Vitamin d3 and B12 …….2. Stomach acid( only if you face indigestion and heartburn — low stomach acid also causes your body to absorb fewer nutrients since the breakdown of food does not happen properly — I would recommend you to read a book on the importance of stomach acid by Jonathan V Wright)……3. Gut health(90 percent of the serotonin in your body is produced in your gut, and due to the poor eating habits, many harmful bacteria are developed in your gut which makes it hard to produce serotonin)
- Supplements to counter the deficiencies mentioned above:- 1. Vitamin D3 and B12 tablets 2. HCL betaine( to increase stomach acid) 3. Probiotics (for better gut health)
Conclusion
First of all, Having depression and anxiety is not the end of life; even the most successful people in the world have experienced anxiety and mental health problems, but they did not lose their hopes and overshadowed all of that to become who they are today.
It’s essential to find meaning in your Pain; Pain can be your most significant growth factor only if it has any purpose attached to it. Going through depression and anxiety has taught me many things that I might not have learned if I had not gone through them.
Similarly, if you are going through any difficulties in life, Use that Pain to chase more incredible things in life, find meaning in your pain, and then even your biggest problems will feel like a gift.
Every pain you go through has some sort of lesson attached to it, and it never goes away until it has taught you something. Once you have learned the lesson, you will find the pain vanishing slowly…:-)
Shout out to Joanna Skladanek, Loved reading this piece by her:-
