Magic Interwebs dollarydoos!

Hark, the 10x APY trading bot!

At first, I was afraid, I was petrified! I can’t get compound interest out of my mind!

Alexander Mitchell
Published in
3 min readMar 9, 2021

Alas, the mutterings of greedy guts. Someone who has subscribed to access an algorithmic trading bot. “That’s a bloody mouthful”, you might rightly say. But it’s becoming one of the hottest topics in the cryptocurrency space.

“Beep Boop”, I coded a bot that beats the market! Promise!

You ought not to trust celebrities who discuss crypto. If their investments are going so well, why are they bothering to talk to you? Pure egalitarianism and kindness? No. As my German teacher used to say “Nein! Nein Nein! Nein! Nein!” My teacher was right, of course. These bots are nought but turds. Very pretty and shiny turds with lots of cool code! But still brown, stinky, mystery-corn-filled turds. Why? because they haven’t demonstrated that they’re more profitable than buying and holding. They simply do not beat the market.

or does it?

If these people are so good at investing, why waste time on a bot? Unless of course, it has a tiny, itsy, little bit to do with some pocket money. By which I mean money, that was formerly in your pocket and is now in theirs.

Gimme, it’s mine!

You would expect something in return for this exchange of funds. Unfortunately, you’ll get nothing. The reason being is that not one of these bots has beaten, or outperformed the market over the last 12 months. Not one. They are showing 1000% gains, because Bitcoin has done more than 1000% in the past 12 months. There is really, nothing remarkable about them.

Much gains, many profits.

The bots with 10x gains also garner a fee of close to $200 USD a month. It’s very, very dear to be absolutely frank. However, if these bots beat the market $200 translates to well, nothing. Say compounding didn’t even exist, 1000% is enough to make anyone, even with a minuscule principal, incredibly wealthy. In a very short space of time.

Earn it, or pay it.

The people advertising their bots aren’t bad. They’re just like you or I trying to make a dollar in an emerging market. There aren’t so many bad actors, but there are a few who really don’t know what they’re doing. Not four days ago, an ‘algo’ trader deleted both his social media and his bot after producing huge losses for his customers. These people are anonymous. As such, the assurances they give you are entirely worthless. Hold your pennies, and manage your own portfolio. Nobody, absolutely nobody will spend your dollars more wisely than you will. You experienced the pain to make that money. You sacrificed your time and labour. You should be responsible for it.

Workin’ 9 to 5

Stop subscribing to algo bots.

Alexander Mitchell
All images are licensed by creative commons.



Alexander Mitchell

Market Nerd. Interests in Real Estate, ASX, S&P & Crypto Currency