Tongue-tied

at university

I feel you’ve got something to say! he said.
Don’t hide
Don’t keep it inside
Say it out loud
Say it proud.
But how could I?
How could I find my voice?
Children should be seen, not heard, said Mam
Don’t speak until you’re spoken to
Don’t contradict — if I say black’s white, you’ll agree with me.
And now, in seminars of twelve,
In a room full of confident middle-class southerners,
you want me to speak?
And in tutorials of two,
You wait for my opinion.
But you’re the teacher!
My tutor
An adult
And a man.
It’s not so easy
Not so easy for me.
Years of obedience have straitjacketed me
Tied my mind
Hushed my tongue
Quieted my thought.
An all-girl Northern Catholic school:
Priests talk
Teachers talk
Children?
Ssh!
Listen
We had the spontaneity trained out.