Any day now they are going to discover I am not really…..
a.k.a. “I was lucky”, “The timing was good” and other stories.
You have just started that new job, the one you fought hard for, the one that just a week ago you knew you deserved, and that you had to prove yourself 3 times over to be offered. You should be feeling on top of the world, excited, positive and confident, but I am going to take an educated guess that in reality the words going around your head are less “Wow look at me, I did it” and more “ Any minute now they are going to find out I can’t do this job as well as they had hoped”.
If so you are not alone, not by a long way, you and much of the rest of the female of the species (and some of the male) are suffering from what is known as “Imposter Syndrome” (IS). That feeling that you don’t really quite belong here, you are not really quite competent enough for this; often despite all evidence to the contrary.
At first I thought it was just me, then after some discussions locally I thought maybe it was just being in the IBM UK Labs where the people that you compare yourself to are the world experts on a given product or technology (they invented it for goodness sake!). Then having been on a few courses, conferences and discussions with other women in IT I decided that maybe it was the IT industry, after all it is forever changing, and full of bright people. Finally after speaking to an old teacher friend of mine (who is BTW an awesome teacher) about it and having her respond “Oh my goodness I thought that was just me”, I realised that Imposter Syndrome isn’t picky about where you work, who you work with or what industry you are in, it happens to everyone. It is just that some people squash that voice of doubt, some people don’t manage to squash the voice, but manage to hide the fact that it is there from the outside world and some folks just give into it and end up believing, feeling and behaving like a fraud.
So how can you stop/reduce Imposter Syndrome:
I can’t claim to be so sorted that this never affects me, however when it does I have found the following useful…..
Understand that you are ‘suffering’ from Imposter Syndrome, acknowledge that is how you feel, but also that is it not necessarily the reality that others around you see or experience. Just recognising what is happening is a great first step. Perish the thought that you may in fact be judging yourself against tougher criteria than the rest of the world!!
“Reality is frequently inaccurate.” ― Douglas Adams, The Restaurant at the End of the Universe
2) Recognise that just because you are still learning does not mean you are not knowledgeable. Let’s be honest if experts in pretty much any field of work these days refused to learn another thing they would not be experts for very much longer! You can take credit externally and internally for what you know and what you are good at without it meaning you think you know everything.
“Intellectual growth should commence at birth and cease only at death.” ― Albert Einstein
3) Have a good, honest dialog with yourself and list your competencies, the things you do well, the areas that you have had positive feedback. If you drift to negatives, notice that and step right back to focus on positive. Remind yourself of those when IS threatens to unnerve you.
Notice here I say an honest dialog with yourself, this doesn’t mean brutally honest, it means because it is an internal ‘conversation’ you can ditch all the cultural expectations (“nice” girls run themselves down, not big themselves up!) and embarrassment of saying that you are good at something in public, because this literally is just between you and errr,…… you. Unfortunately this cultural expectation in how girls should present and talk about themselves, which differs from boys is why Imposter Syndrome is more common and frequent in women.
“Honesty is the first chapter of the book wisdom.” ― Thomas Jefferson
4) Remember that no one is perfect (contrary to what some people may like to portray), and no one is expected to be perfect. We each have our strengths and weaknesses, our areas of confidence and of doubt, they key is not to dwell on the latter, but to focus on the former and bring what you know and what you can do fully to the table to share with and balance with the strengths (and weaknesses) of others.
“Imperfection is underrated. Perfection is overrated.” ― Helena Bonham Carter
Finally, remember getting out of your comfort zone is when you learn, develop and find out more of the things you are great at, so embrace it, deliberately go there sometimes. Certainly don’t end up using up a lot of your precious energy worrying and trying to avoid your discomfort zone, because if nothing else, I am afraid that does nothing to rid you of Imposter Syndrome anyway!
I would love you hear your hints, tips and experiences with Imposter Syndrome to develop this article even more. Twitter users can log in with their twitter ID and click on the ‘+’ on the right hand side to add a comment.
http://www.impostorsyndrome.com/ @ValerieYoung
