In the Wake of a Massacre
As I write and try to make sense of the most recent mass shooting in The United States, I acknowledge my privilege as a white upper-class person who has not been directly affected by gun violence. Growing up in a predominately white upper class town I was sheltered from crime, violence, and the reality of much of our world. Thankfully my parents made it a point to expose us to prominent issues in the world. That being said, I have never had a family member or friend die from gun violence and many cannot say the same.
There are shootings every day that we do not hear about. “From 2009–2016 in the U.S. there have been 156 mass shootings- incidents in which four or more people were shot and killed, not including the shooter”. The large media networks do not publicize every shooting and therefore the majority of us are unaware of the communities being torn apart and we will not know the names of the deceased.
The news does not cover the shootings that contribute to the statistic that, “On an average day, 96 Americans are killed with guns”. The news does not acknowledge that systemic racism and gun violence are inextricably linked. “Black men are 13 times more likely than non-Hispanic white men to be shot and killed with guns.” Racism cannot be removed from the conversation about gun violence.
When Trayvon Martin was killed by George Zimmerman on February 26, 2012 the Martin family did not have time to mourn instead they had to go to court to fight for their belief that Trayvon Martin had been racially profiled and George Zimmerman did not act in defense. Trayvon Martin’s death spurred protests all across the country in defense of both Martin and Zimmerman. While the news, particularly conservative media networks, highlight the danger of gun violence from minority individuals in fact of, “62 cases between 1982 and 2012, 44 of the killers were white men and only one was a woman”.
Why did I not hear about the shooting of Tamir Rice? A 12-year-old boy from Cleveland, Ohio, murdered by a white police officer on Nov. 22, 2014 for playing with a toy gun. The white police officers were not sentenced for a criminal offensive and the city paid Tamir’s mother 6 million dollars to settle the case. Blatant racism.
December 14, 2012, the head of my school called an all school meeting when news broke of the Sandy Hook Elementary School shooting that took the lives of 20 children and 6 adults. I sat there paralyzed with fear, sadness, and anger. I called my mom; eyes welled up with tears, and asked her what we could do to help? She replied, “We need better gun control”. I remember seeing headlines such as “this will be the last time our children are killed”… At the time I had no idea that this would not be the last mass shooting. Perhaps I was naive but I thought that someone in the government would do something to stop this… Years later I realize that “someone” is you and me.
June 12, 2016: “Orlando Gunman Attacks Gay Nightclub, Leaving 50 Dead” “As he had done after several previous mass shootings, President Obama said the shooting demonstrated the need for what he called “common-sense” gun measures.”
October 1, 2017 “Concert Massacre, Las Vegas”. I wish disturbed could do my emotions justice.
November 5, 2017 “At least 26 killed in mass shooting at Texas Church” Outraged and helpless. Numb.
On Wednesday February 21, 2018 at about 3pm I felt my phone buzz in my pocket. I took my phone out, glancing at the red CNN notification. For a split second, I considered swiping it away because just the day before I told myself to stop reading the news. My eyes stayed locked for a second too long, and I saw the headline “17 dead in Florida high school massacre”. I felt sick and looked up from my phone to see if anyone else had also seen this news. Emptiness. Numb.
No longer is a human telling me about the death of other humans. Instead I am told that human beings have been slaughtered through a small red box on a screen. Tomorrow when I feel the buzz and the addictive blue light catches my eye I will hesitate a while longer wondering if I should be prepared to see the headline “Kylie Jenner gives birth” or “School Massacre”. Emotionally drained I headed to yoga class, my own place of worship, and dedicated my practice to those affected by this tragedy. I bowed my head in prayer for a safer and more just world.
I mourned for those families affected by gun violence every day and those affected by the Florida massacre. For underprivileged and minority communities, gun violence is not uncommon. Violence is no longer sparing the privileged and white and of course it takes violence against white people for us to actually wake the fuck up. I can’t even imagine what it must feel like to see people finally outraged, at last, and ready to take action about gun violence after you have had multiple family members murdered by guns. Why are we still living in a world where it takes white people to be pissed off for there to be action?
