Caring for Our Afghan Neighbors
By the Rev. Nancey Johnson Bookstein, Deacon, & Larry Bangs
In August 2021, a bomb went off in the Kabul airport in Afghanistan, changing lives radically and forever. Here in Colorado, we watched with horror for days, on every news channel.
In October, a staff member at Holy Comforter Episcopal Church received a flier about ways for churches to respond to this disaster. Most of the refugees fleeing Afghanistan had been placed in temporary quarters at military installations around the world, waiting for new homes in receiving countries. Soon, thousands of families were being airlifted to safety in the United States. Many of the refugees had supported U.S. efforts in Afghanistan during the 20 years of our presence there. Because of that, their lives and the lives of their families were in danger.
In response to the airlifts overseas, Colorado identified Lutheran Family Services Rocky Mountain (LFS) as an official resettlement agency. It would work with federal, state, and local agencies to find homes for the refugees. Holy Comforter parishioner Larry Bangs acted quickly. Supported by the Rev. Lyndon Shakespeare, Holy Comforter arranged to co-sponsor an Afghan family through LFS. Six parishioners joined Larry’s effort, agreeing to devote 15–20 hours each month as cultural mentors once they were assigned a family. They would teach family members basic English, make sure they had familiar foods and access to necessities. Parishioners would transport families for visits to secure immigration papers, attend appointments so they could obtain federal and state identification documents, social security cards, driver’s licenses, and so forth. The goal was to help the head of the family become independent within 6 months
After the first week or so, Larry realized he needed a management team to organize groups of volunteers, procure supplies, and maintain communications. I’m the deacon serving St. Brigit’s in Frederick, so Larry recruited me, while I recruited another Holy Comforter parishioner. I checked with our new vicar, the Rev. Tim Backus, and our Outreach Committee. We decided to join Larry’s team at Holy Comforter and to bring this outreach opportunity to the entire congregation at St. Brigit’s. After a few Zoom meetings for planning, Larry and I decided to ask other churches in the Front Range Region to help. In addition to Holy Comforter and St. Brigit’s, we approached St. Alban’s in Windsor in addition to St. Ambrose and St. Aidan’s, both in Boulder. Although we did not know anything about the family we would be supporting, these 5 congregations committed to supplying everything necessary for an apartment and doing whatever else was necessary. St. Gregory’s in Littleton was very generous with financial support. We were soon a collection of excited, hopeful people waiting to welcome our family. But long before “our” assigned family got to Colorado, we had an opportunity to help another co-sponsor with his assigned family that had just arrived.
That family (Kabul 1) had arrived in Colorado in November, after surviving the bombing at the Kabul International Airport as they waited to fly out of the country. The Dad worked as a translator for the US military. They were at ground zero when the bombs were detonated. Both he and one of his brothers were among 170 Afghans killed in that explosion. All of the surviving family members were badly wounded, some critically. Airlifted out of the country to overseas military bases until they were stabilized, the family was then flown to the States and re-hospitalized at Walter Reed National Military Medical Center in Bethesda, Maryland for the next 3 months. It was there that the mother and eldest daughter (21) learned their husband and father, and uncle had been killed in the deadly airport blast. The family included mother (46), 4 daughters (21,20, 8,and 4), 2 sons (14 and 16), a paternal grandmother (72), and a cousin (11).
Finally, after their discharge from Walter Reed, the (Kabul 1)family was flown to Denver. One child was admitted directly to Children’s Hospital, Anschutz Medical Campus. She spent a month there before being able to join her family who were in temporary housing in Lakewood. Afghans have extensive family networks throughout the United States, in part because of the 20 years of war. As it happens, this family had a close relative who had immigrated a couple of years ago and lived in Broomfield. Even though the family’s co-sponsors were in Lakewood, Lutheran Family services relocated them to Broomfield. Holy Comforter and St. Brigit volunteered to be the local backup co-sponsor to help support this family while we waited for a family to be officially assigned to us. The day that the family moved into their house in Broomfield was the same day that the 8 year old was discharged, after a month, from Children’s Hospital.
Our “backup” responsibilities are primarily transportation. We drive them to medical appointments and to state and federal agencies, schools, grocery stores, and pharmacies. We take them to Precious Child, a nonprofit that collects donations of clothes, toys, shoes and has an actual store where families can shop for their needs without having to pay a bill. As more Afghan families arrived in Broomfield, Precious Child carved out a place in the store filled with culturally appropriate clothing for all family members.
My specific diaconal ministry continues to accompany the “almost-nine-year-old” to her medical appointments. As the most severely injured of the family members, she had multiple complex medical conditions. But her month at Anschutz after three months at Walter Reed had exposed her to enough English so she could understand her care providers and ask and answer simple questions. Her eldest sister came with us at first. Then her mother, who knew a bit of English but could not speak it, came instead. In a short time, we were welcomed by the family, now headed by the mother and grandmother caring for two sons, four daughters, and a young cousin. The boys are enrolled in high school. The eldest daughter (21 years old) had been a fourth-year medical student in Afghanistan and is now working as a receptionist at a local medical office. She still needs to be transported to and from work every day. The 4 year old is in preschool, the 8 year old is a 3rd grader, and their cousin is in middle school. The cousin’s parents (Kabul 2) arrived in early January with a baby expected in the next few months. Eleven people are living in a 5 bedroom house furnished by LFS.
In addition to driving the family to the hospital and physical therapy sessions, I help the eldest daughter set up patient portals, schedule and manage appointments, and work with the school nurse and teachers. We even work on her English. (I am trying to learn Dari), but she is doing much better with language acquisition than I am! We spend time together, building relationships by sharing observations about our cultural differences and similarities. With what little money they have, the family always sets hot tea and snacks in front of me. They invite us to join them for meals. The family is unceasingly gracious and thankful..
One day, while we were driving, the eldest daughter said to me: “In Afghanistan we lived just like you: nice house, a summer house with gardens in the country, work, school, shopping, restaurants — just like you. Then, in one minute, we had nothing.” Amid all their loss, which I know can never be made whole, I sensed she had hope that somehow they would be OK. When they landed in Washington, DC, only the eldest daughter knew some English. Her father had begun teaching her, “just in case.”
While we served these 2 related families (Kabul 1 and Kabul 2), we added 2 more cousins (Kabul 3) who were separated from their families during the bombing. These young men were also badly injured. Now recovering, one is a computer programmer; we were able to secure a loaded desktop computer powerful enough to support his programming. They will live together in a one bedroom apartment when it is ready. We keep procuring things for additional apartments, driving, and doing all the things we need to do to help them. We continue to pray for their parents; one set of parents remains in Afghanistan and the other migrated to Uzbekistan. Efforts continue to bring their parents to the U.S. The third family, also related, consists of three cousins and their parents, an aunt and uncle. They will move into a larger apartment. Another family is fortunate to also have a close relative in Broomfield. They are staying with a relative while they wait for their apartment to be ready. This family of five includes three daughters, their parents, and an aunt. We’ve found a pro bono immigration attorney for them.
As we arranged medical appointments, supplied basic needs, including cell phones, laptops, and whatever was needed by the 3 other families , the original team of 5 churches was finally “officially”assigned a family, a young couple and their two small daughters ( 4 and 2). The father had been a NATO translator for Italy, while his wife had been a preschool teacher. The Italian arm of NATO left a few weeks before any significant Taliban threat was recognized and NATO took all their translators and families with them. A family from Holy Comforter is housing them until their 2 bedroom apartment is ready. Along with the two other families, they will move into permanent housing sometime in March or April. The father has passed his driving test, has job offers, and is looking for a car. The 5 churches came together and furnished their apartment: 2 bedrooms, eat in kitchen, bathroom and linen closet, living room.
Our team was able to acquire furnishings and supplies for four apartments with support from Heidi Henkel, council member in Broomfield. The Afghan Refugee Resettlement program was hugely helpful, along with the St. Brigit community, generous folks from Episcopal churches across the Front Range as well as congregations and community members. Heidi was also able to get all the kids enrolled in schools and preschool. She is also making sure they have their Social Security cards and are qualified for government benefit programs. She is an incredible blessing to everyone.
The Afghan people have escaped privation and danger. They have left their homeland behind: everything they had and knew.
Christ calls us to care for one another. No exceptions. Bishop Curry tells us: “if it isn’t of love, it isn’t of God.” We are responding to these calls with faith and love, and the work has filled us with hope for humankind. We thank God for calling us, allowing us to serve our Afghan neighbors.
We are a Resurrection people. We have received the gift of watching the renewal of our Islamic friends as we are called to be the hands and heart of God to the stranger. But they are no longer strangers. They are lifetime friends. Thanks be to God!
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THE REV. NANCEY JOHNSON BOOKSTEIN is a Deacon at St. Brigit Episcopal Church in Frederick.
LARRY BANGS is the head of the refugee management team at Holy Comforter Episcopal Church, Broomfield.
