“New Year, New Me” Bollocks

It is incredible how powerful the effect of changing the number on a calendar can be. It awakens the slumbering mind into producing all kinds of fanciful thoughts that would seldom be produced in the monotonous day to day existence we trudge through.

New body, new values, new job and a new me. Scrolling through my facebook page this morning I was amazed by how many people were subconsciously so deeply unsatisfied with their lives. Yes there were the numerous photos of people with their ‘dream team’, ‘dream partner’ etc. But why is it that the New Year simultaneously produces such discontentment amongst ourselves yet such jubilation?

One could say that perhaps this confliction is down to an ever narcissistic approach to our lives encouraged by social media sites like facebook. Whilst such media drives easier connection I can’t help but feel that many of us (particularly in the New Year) would feel the need to attempt to make such drastic change, to ourselves without its omnipresence in our lives.

So which path do we take in the face of ‘New Year, New Me’ mania. Do we engage in the at times sobering art of self-reflection stimulated by the apparent superiority of our facebook friend’s virtual lives? Or do we rebel and stick to our guns of how we have been living our lives the past year?

Perhaps instead of these two options we can choose a third way, being positively present. If being autistic and anxious has taught me anything it is that this mode of living is the most difficult. A natural disposition to only negative self-reflection and to comparing quality of life now against my past memories, hardly makes for stability in a moment by moment basis.

Condensing existence down to one breath at a time does help but perhaps something more is needed. Finally the revelation has dawned on me that the future is not about being a ‘New Me’ but a ‘Now Me’ instead. Being confident, productive, fearless and creative in the moment rather than in the future. There is a distinction between these two ideas because new implies updating or somehow replacing the current me. None of us need to replace that version of ourself because then we are removing, rather than adding to our character, and isn’t that the ultimate goal of this whole thing to add rather than subtract from who we are?

All these skills, characteristics, and goals that we are being actively encouraged to write down now aren’t plucked from thin air. They are within us lying alongside the negativity that can also arise from time to time waiting for us to pluck it out.

So instead of wishing you guys a happy new year I will be hoping you have a great moment today, where you realise that you are in control of your happiness in that breath and you are willing to be fearless enough to take it.

Author: thefarmerandhisgun

Originally published at comeasyouareblog.com