Stay authentic

Staying authentic and genuine is paramount. Rather than imitating others, it is crucial to celebrate what makes you unique and different. The essence of your individuality is what sets you apart.

The renowned writer Ralph Waldo Emerson once penned: “You speak so loudly I cannot hear what you are saying.” This profound statement resonates deeply, especially when it comes to forming first impressions. It isn’t always about what is said out loud, but rather, it is the unspoken that speaks volumes.

First impressions aren’t solely built on verbal communication, but rather on the entirety of one’s presentation. Consider this hypothetical scenario: if I had walked into the room wearing a casual sweater and jogging pants, with no additional belongings, what assumptions would you have made? What kind of impression would that have left on you?

You would have undoubtedly formed an opinion, a judgment of sorts, based purely on my appearance. This demonstrates the power of non-verbal cues in communication and how they can influence our perception of people.

I’m still trying to understand the intricacies of my younger years. I can’t tell if my recollections are distorted or whether they hold genuine truth. However, I’ve come to realize that my childhood, my upbringing, has significantly shaped my character and influenced my life. While it may not have dictated each and every aspect of my existence, it undeniably influenced key elements of my personality.

These experiences were unfelt and unthought at the time. It was only later, after a series of mishaps, burdens, and even a head injury, that I began to truly appreciate my past. I started to comprehend how my upbringing, which I had previously seen as underwhelming and unappreciated, even by me, played a crucial role in my development. It shaped my feelings, my perceptions, and ultimately, my identity.

I now recall, with a sense of disdain, an overpowering assumption that plagued my younger years. I believed, without question, that my exceptional cognitive abilities, such as forming vivid mental images and quickly making connections, destined me for greatness. I was confident, perhaps too much so, that I was destined for high places.

Looking back, I realize the naivety of my assumptions. I remember believing that social rank didn’t apply to me, that I was somehow above it all. Despite my lack of social skills and my disconnection from societal norms, I believed I was superior because I excelled in many areas. These accomplishments further fueled my inflated self-perception.

Today, I feel a sense of shame when I reflect on my past arrogance. I understand now that my intelligence and talents didn’t justify my inflated self-worth. My inability to cope with existence led me down a path of false assumptions and misguided beliefs.

I once had a conversation with my parents about my upbringing. They, or at least one of them, denied any responsibility for how I turned out, insisting that life experiences shape a person more than anything else. While there’s some truth to this, I firmly believe that the coping mechanisms we employ and how we approach challenges are largely influenced by our early caregivers.

I’m not trying to lay blame or preach, and I’m certainly no professional. But I speak from personal experience when I say that irregular parenting can lead to misguided assumptions in later life.

That said, I don’t want to give the impression that my childhood was entirely negative. Even those raised in warzones can look back on their childhoods with a certain fondness. However, I feel it’s important not to paint an overly rosy picture of the past, especially when it’s not balanced with the necessary preparations for facing life’s inevitable hardships.