Tech Meetups and Startup Events Don’t Suck, Maybe You Do.
8 Ways to Get the Most out of the Tech Events You Attend
Free beer, sweaty engineers and live demos that sort of work.
Free swag, recruiters and job seekers looking for a new gig.
Free coffee, business people and pitches on AirBnB’s for <insert here>.
Free buzzwords, panel discussions and “expert” startup advice.
Oh God, this sucks, my iPhone battery is dead and I’m suffocating.
I should’ve just stayed at home. Wrong.
Recently, I’ve noticed more people telling me how shitty tech meetups have become. The reasons vary, but here are a few common ones I hear: They’re getting too big, there are too many wantrepreneurs showing up, there aren’t enough interesting people for me to talk to, blah, blah, blah. Well maybe the problem isn’t the meetup, maybe it’s you.
I’m not oblivious to the fact that some events are obviously better planned and run than others, but I think the responsibility of having a good tech meetup experience also lies with the attendee. If you’ve decided to show up, then really think to yourself: “What can I personally do, to make this a good experience, both for myself and for the other attendees?” You might not realize it, but your intentions do matter. With that said, here are 8 ways I try to get the most out of the tech events I attend:
TLDR? — My approach is to simply try and have a few authentic conversations. I try to be as authentic as possible around sharing what I’m interested in and why I’m there. I focus on having a handful of quality conversations with people whose names I hope to remember when I get home. That’s it.
1. I don’t bring business cards, I bring a pen.
I want there to be a genuine interest or real purpose in sharing contact information. Giving away a business card is easy. Having someone wait as you write down your name and email address is weird, unless of course you’ve had a meaningful conversation with them — that’s the point. I once came home with a piece of paper with a name and email address of someone I actually wanted to connect with later. It didn’t end up in my stack of business cards (which usually end up in the recycling bin), instead it reminded me of our conversation and we set up a time to grab coffee the following week.
2. I don’t resist job seekers, I try to help them.
Yes, there are lots of people looking for jobs, and that can be annoying for you if you find it getting in the way of your “network session.” Sorry I don’t buy that. If you’re privileged enough to be an employer or a startup founder, it’s also your job to recruit — whether you’re currently hiring or not. Or at the very least, provide some tips or think of anyone else you know in the community that may find the individual’s skills useful. If you already have a job, try and look back to when you were job hunting and put yourself in the shoes of the person across from you. Tell them what it took for you to get your job and the types of skills your startup values. I have a rule: if I meet someone looking for a job at a tech event, I’ll say yes to scheduling a follow up coffee meeting. If someone I meet wants to grab a coffee to learn more about startup job hunting or where I work, I think that shows initiative and so I’ll carve out 30 minutes to try and help.
3. I don’t look for co-founders, I look for people I’d want to hang out with again.
Ah co-founder hunting: the endless search for the unicorn, the perfectly complementary business partner that’s been your roadblock to starting up. Yep, I was a child once and I too believed in fairytales. I grew up and now I don’t believe in unicorns, I believe in probability. With that said, I don’t think it’s possible to find a co-founder at a tech meetup. → I think its possible to meet someone that you’d want to hang out with again and maybe become friends. → And… I think it’s possible to be friends and want to work on a cool side project together. → And… I think working on a cool side project can be a first step towards a positive working relationship. → And… I think a positive working relationship could one day turn into a co-founder relationship. → And.. so ya, I try to find lots of people I’d want to hang out with again and thereby increase my probability of finding a co-founder. Maybe it’ll never happen, but who cares— I’ll make lots of friends along the way.
4. I don’t work the crowd, I work the conversation.
Unless you’re hosting an event, this idea of working the crowd is overrated and actually disingenuous if you ask me. I actually want to remember the names of the people I’ve talked to. So, I consider each introduction and handshake as an opportunity to have an engaging conversation. I try really hard to remain present, hearing what others have to say and finding ways to make a connection. Most of these attempts end up fizzling out, but then some don’t— they end up working and we have a long conversation. For most tech meetups I attend, I usually hang around for about 2 hours or so. In that time, I try to find 1 or 2 people to have a genuine conversation with.
5. I don’t stick to my friends, I try to find new people I’ve never met before.
It’s not that I don’t enjoy hanging out with my friends, I really do. But, defaulting to the few people I know in a room is too easy and really doesn’t push the boundaries of my thinking. New people means new conversations, and new conversations means exploring different subjects and different ways of thought. Now that’s interesting. More often than not, I go to events and meetups alone because it forces me to spark conversation with randoms in areas outside of my comfort zone.
6. I don’t fight away awkward moments of being alone, I embrace them.
Being alone doesn’t scare me anymore, and I don’t rush to the bar to refill my drink when I don’t have anyone to talk to. To be honest, I did before but now I don’t. I embrace awkward moments: I’ll look around the room, try to listen for an interesting conversation, and then see if I can politely make my way into it. If that doesn’t work, then I’ll think to myself — “What can I learn in this moment right now?” I end up looking around the room noticing things like the structure of the building, the type of graphics on the wall, or a funny t-shirt someone is wearing. I don’t know how, but it almost always ends up turning into an ice breaker — “Hey, did you notice that graffiti on the wall? I wonder how long it took to paint.” Bottom line: being alone in a new place can be a great learning experience and a lot of fun. I apply the same thinking to travelling as well, but I’ll save that for another post.
7. I don’t ask people what they do, I ask them why they’re here.
Forget the what do you do routine. Maybe someone’s a professional clown — who cares? Actually I’d love to talk to a professional clown at a tech meetup, but that’s besides the point. I try to ask questions like why are you here? What brings you to the event? What are you looking to learn from today’s speakers? I think this helps to fight the highly prevalent, but bullshit professional gauging process where we think to ourselves: is this person valuable to have in my network? It just does not matter. Stop trying to build your network. Instead, try and build authentic connections based on interest. At some point people will start sharing what they do for work and that’s fine, but it prevents meaningless title dropping like I’m the Founder and CEO of <insert random word here>.
8. I don’t hold back my honest opinion, I share it as a prerequisite of being part of the community.
If someone decides to pitch or demo their startup idea to me, I try giving them some objective feedback (hopefully they’re open to receiving it as well) that they can use to improve their product. Having said that, I think there’s also fine line between honesty and arrogance. Don’t shit all over a person’s idea because you think it will never work, ask them more questions about it instead. What sort of research or customer development have they done? Is the pain point something they struggle with in their own life? See if you’ve missed something about their value proposition. On the other side of this, please for the love of God don’t give the entrepreneur (I use this term loosely) false hopes. If you don’t understand his pitch then say so, it will help him improve it. If you have some unique insight into her industry than share it, maybe it gives her something to explore further. Giving a generic pat on the back like “Wow that’s awesome, I can totally see how people would use that.” isn’t helping the entrepreneur. Unless of course you’re about to pull out your wallet and sign up yourself.
So stop hating on startup tech events— they don’t suck. If you think it’s fashionable to complain because it somehow boosts your own sense of self importance, then that actually sucks a helluva lot more. You’re not too good to be there and if you think that, then please do everyone else a favour and stay at home. If you’re comfortable in doing really scary things like being yourself and having authentic conversations, then come find me. We have lots to talk about. Oh and I promise not to give you my business card. :-)
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Image Credit: Hello…My Name is Awesome — By Melvin Wilson
