Red Tent Women’s Circle
Since 2012 I have been drawn to work with groups of women to help inspire, empower and support them.
I was fascinated by the red tent movement, a circle of women meeting once a month, according to the lunar cycle, to sit in circle and share their hopes, dreams, wisdom, pain and challenges.
Red tents used to appear in tribal society- they were menstrual huts. As women tended to all bleed at the same time of the month they would retire from all their tasks for a few days each month where they could just ‘be’.
This is so important to women to give themselves this time as naturally the body is clearing out an cleansing, replenishing for the next month. Obviously it is easier said than done in this competitive, patriarchal society we live in where we are encouraged to do more, keep busy, work harder etc.
By carrying on regardless it can mean you are working against your body’s natural abilities to keep balanced and we can become ill or depleted of energy.
Since most women that I know are naturally givers- helping all their family and friends; often neglecting themselves in the process, self nurturing becomes extra poignant. For some reason we seem to need the permission from others to do this, it is not ingrained or taught to us that we are more than worthy of looking after ourselves.
Although the red tent movement that is now popular in the West is not dictated by women’s periods/ moon cycles this knowledge being reclaimed by females, in my opinion, is integral to our society.
When in circle general guidelines suggest we should aim to be our truest, most authentic selves when there. That we allow ourselves to speak truly from the heart. Whereas in our daily lives we may spend a lot of time conversing about ‘surface’ level conversations- in a women’s circle we are encouraged to go deeper. To be truthful and honest- even if that means revealing some of our darker ‘shadow’ selves.
When it is your turn to speak holding the talking stick or something equivalent, it is the role of the rest of the group to be present and listen intently. If someone gets upset (which I find the most difficult of the guidelines) it is discouraged to soothe that person with touch or a tissue. Instead we allow them to release what their pain is, enhanced by the focus and awareness of the rest of the group.
Through studying some of the incredible work by Alexandra Pope I realised how important it is for women to have a space in their lives where they can just be themselves and come together once a month in an open non judgemental space with their ‘sisters’.
I chose to start my own red tent circle in January this year. Although only two women came for the first one (I remember crying thinking why am I bothering?) I have carried on following the advice from one of my mentors, Penny, who said “even if no one came the fact that you are holding the space, telling the universe that there’s room for women to be together and heal here, it is enough.”
So I carried on and we are about to have our last circle of the year. We haven’t missed a month and over 20 women have been to this. Some of the feedback from the circle has been incredible:
“I love the red tent…it is something I look forward to every month and I get so much from it”
“this is a non-judgemental space and that is why I love it so much I also love the variety and the fact that this is so dear to your heart.”
“it was incredibly moving listening to other women talking about the challenges, trials and victories in their lives in a safe, accepting environment. There was an openness to such a broad range of ideas, I felt that I was welcome there”
It is an absolute honour to be able to bring women together to support and nourish each other, to share their pains, woes, successes and dreams.
I believe there should be a red tent in every neighbourhood and girls should grow up knowing about it’s profound power to change the lives of all women for the better.
Next we need to work on men’s circles being created far and wide…
For more information on the Red Tent that I run please see:
Alexandra Pope- http://redschool.net/
