Essay
Diary of a Bored Housewife
A quintessential satire for those who judge too much and realize too less. Try gardening, might help!
Dear Reader,
‘I don’t want pancake’, my little one grumbles, a tiny frown dancing on his face. ‘We had this the day before yesterday, I can’t eat it again’, he reasons. ‘If you eat it today, we’ll order pizza tomorrow’, I assuage, the sentence coming out too naturally, the years have taught me well. There’s little grumbling and murmurs of ‘boring’, and 20 minutes later, I have an empty plate to clean. A usual day in my life? No. A usual occurrence? Yes.
We live in a world where there is such a stark dearth of individuality, that the first few visuals people associate with housewives are homebodies, cooking, nappies, babies, nagging, and the like. Yes, I prepare 3 meals a day for my family, yes, I have changed 7 nappies in one day at a time, yes, I have two wonderful children, and yes, I have at times nagged and got nagged at. And yes, I am much more than that. Perhaps if people were to take the time, to care enough, to remove the superficial screens in front of them, they would see deeper than the surface. And that’s where, dear reader, the truth lies.
There’s always a choice, and as long as it’s one you make with full consciousness of your being without hurting anyone, it’s yours to make. There’s no choice less than the other. Society just loves to put people in boxes and sticks labels on them. If you stay at home, you're a free woman. If you choose your career, you are a professional woman. If you manage to do both, you are a superwoman. At no point in time, can you just be a woman? An adjective is your unwanted yet sticky companion. As a species, we would have attained true advancement when individuals are truly recognized for their deeds, beyond these labels, beyond genders, and beyond choices.
Our choices do define us as individuals. While they do decide the trajectory of our lives, sometimes for the better, they have this annoying habit of becoming the entirety of your alphabet. I have had introductions that brushed through the en masse ‘Oh, you don’t work, this age, how many children, good life, the end.’ Personally, I would have loved to share my passion for plants and gardening. Or how I dedicate time to the township development as a secretary of the society. Or how I organize cooking classes at times. But that is perhaps too much of a bother. They see you, look at a housewife, tick a checkbox, and move forward. You whine in your mind about the unfair judgment, eat a tub of ice cream on movie night, and move forward. Humans are simple like that.
What’s not simple is when this generalization muddies the pores that it should not reach. The upturned noses, the condescending remarks, the polite yet unnecessary assurances, what are they for? If one cannot take the pains to know a person, do they deserve the right to judge them? There is no plight I wish to share or a grave injustice I want to be reformed. I merely want to stand by the choice I make, and would like to order fewer sneers on the menu, please. There’s no condemning one lifestyle over another. You can be someone passionate about your career, willing to attain mastery and make a name for yourself. You can also be someone who wishes to be there in their entirety during kids’ childhoods. Modern conditioning may sidetrack you, you may have an opinion, but never at the cost of putting others down to prove yourself right.
Quick updates!
I have a mini terrace garden now (and I just got a new Bonsai!).
My older one celebrated his 11th birthday yesterday and the younger one is 7.
I teach my kids, they don’t go to tuition.
We have many secret games to which we dedicate 2 hours daily.
I am also handling the administration side of the construction of a side road in our township.
My husband says I am the best baker in our circle, and I wholeheartedly agree.
Do you need to know this? Perhaps not. Would you judge the road less traveled? Well, you decide.
