Essay
Can’t Find Words
But there’s beauty in the blockage
I’ve just returned from an18-day vacation. Beyond living in Spain for a year when I was in college, I think that is the longest time away I’ve ever had. I banked all of my time off at work and put it all into one big pot to make it happen and now that my daughter is in college, this kind of extended time away felt possible.
There is so much to say about my time away. My partner and I went to India and the Maldives. It was profound and amazing. It was transformative and restorative. It was connecting and romantic. I am deeply grateful for the experience. The residue of wonder and possibility I am left from this retreat from my normal life is one I will forever cherish.
As I return to my normal life, I am struck by how the 18-day interruption in my daily grind has affected me. As a creature of habit, I have been thrown off of my game, especially with my writing practice, my primary creative outlet.
I feel stuck, clogged, bottled up. How can this be? I am full of rich experiences from temples and chanting and markets and people and delicious food and oceans and marine life and love. I feel grateful for years of clear channel writing where an idea comes and I am able to write it down, capture an experience and bring it from a starting point to an…
