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Essay
Pets, Loved Ones With Cancer, and Picked Flowers
The threat of loss changes our perspective
Sometimes I wonder why I love my cat so intensely. Obviously, she can’t converse like any of my human relations. I’m not particularly lonely. My life has been quite social of late, so it’s not as if it’s for a lack of options. Yet, there’s a certain specialness to the relationship I have with this four-legged creature.
She’s an amazing cat, and I don’t want to downplay her individual grandness, but I think what really enlivens my feelings for her is that I can’t take her for granted. I’m well aware that, if all goes as it’s generally expected to, there’ll be a day where this beautiful animal will be gone, and I’ll still be here.
I don’t feel that way about the humans I love. I unconsciously grant them an assumption of permanence. Of course, consciously I know they won’t be around forever either, but they’ll likely be around just as long as I am, so it might as well be forever. As a consequence, I take their presence for granted.
Recently, I got news of a friend whose mother has been diagnosed with leukemia and given a year to live. It happened out of nowhere. One day all is normal, and the next somebody they love dearly was set on an unstoppable march to their death.
