Spirits Insight
The White Room
Living with disappointment
I had a dream that I was in a couple’s bright and airy contemporary home. Off-white walls showcased nondescript off-white art in a living room about 30’ long. The kitchen and dining area, also off-white, ran parallel along the living room’s long wall. The only color came from a 10’ long decorative pit separating the rooms. Looking more closely I realized that the pit was filled with broken cups and glasses of all different shapes and colors. They had kept every broken cup and glass from childhood through the present, tossing them in as if saving them in a vault. The only way to get from one room to another was to detour around the pit, but they walked as if they didn’t even notice it.
The broken cups and glasses are a metaphor for all of the disappointments, slights, and betrayals that they‘ve experienced. All of the lost dreams, broken hearts and unmet expectations collected and stored for safekeeping. Just as the pit stored the couple’s broken shards of glass, unless examined and dealt with, our minds and bodies will store our emotional memories.
There are many reasons we hold our sadness fresh, but two stand out. First, we may feel comfortable, at times even prideful, in seeing ourselves as the victim. It wasn’t MY fault is a common declaration. But when you allow past experiences to define you, you’re not allowing yourself to fully experience joy in the present. Second, we think we have no choice. We believe that whatever happened in our past left such an impactful impression that having it as a constant presence in the back of our minds seems perfectly natural and unavoidable. It is perfectly natural but it is not unavoidable.
Like the couple in my dream, we can become so adept at averting our eyes from our broken glass that we aren’t even aware of the shadow it casts on every moment of our lives. Blinding yourself to the burdens that you carry from unfulfilled hopes and dreams is like living with a thin layer of fog between you and every possible positive emotion and experience.
At some point something will trigger you in a good way. You may see a happy couple affectionately laughing with each other, a family enjoying each other’s company, a person walking in nature, smiling and just loving the day. At some point it will hit you; happiness is real. And then remember, not only is happiness real, it’s attainable. Whatever you’ve experienced in your life, joy and happiness are available to you.
Healing your mind is hard work. You need intention, commitment, determination and help. But the benefits outweigh the effort so dramatically that you’ll be thanking yourself every day for taking on this rewarding challenge.
My Spirit friends have this to say: You matter. You matter to this world. Whether you believe it or not, we know that you have value and deserve happiness. Please get qualified help so that your experiences will be just a piece of the puzzle of you, not the definition.
For more info on me and my classes check out my website: https://victoriajuster.com/
