I Just Got Laid Off Again. Here’s How I’m Really Feeling.
The raw emotions of chronic unemployment
I had a bad feeling when my boss scheduled an impromptu video call with me last week. My three-month probationary period was coming to a close, and I wasn’t sure whether I’d continue in a part-time capacity or be promoted to full-time. Being laid off entirely never crossed my mind.
Over the last few days, I’ve cried a lot, done a deep clean of the apartment, and taken a day trip with my husband. Each of these things are instrumental to feeling better when the news is still raw. Unemployment is a juggling act of grieving, living, and finding a way forward.
If you can’t tell by now, this isn’t the first time I’ve been laid off, and it likely won’t be the last. But being a veteran of unemployment doesn’t make layoffs any easier, so today, I want to get vulnerable about all the emotions swirling in my brain at the moment.
How I ended up here again
My first layoff was via text message.
It was days after COVID-19 was declared a pandemic and a month shy of my college graduation. Rather than my boss of four years, it was my co-worker who let me know I was being let go.