No, You Can’t Trust Your Database
And All The Costumes, Make-Up, And Auto-tune Won’t Make The Bluff Work
These days everyone has a database… or at least that is the game they’re playing. Honestly, most of them believe it. They click the buttons on their off-the-shelf solutions that export the data. They build a few API calls. And they spend a few dollars on some cloud-based storage solutions like AWS or Azure. Problem solved — we have the data…
Only your database never seems to provide the views, information, or insights that you thought it would.
When I ask a client to go into their database, typically using their off-the-shelf BI tool, to show me some data — the trepidation begins. Often it starts with a shallow sense of confidence. The first round of data and charts has been dressed up. It is the costume layer. Plenty of make-up and lighting to make it look awesome. Go a little deeper…
Can’t read your, Can’t read your
No you can’t read your database
(Data’s missing and nobody)
Can read your, Can read your
No they can’t read your database
(It’s a mess so blame somebody)
Let the dancing and the contortions begin… One to two questions deeper and suddenly things start to disappear. Often times one set of numbers doesn’t match another. The numbers fail to reflect anything close to reality.
A few questions more and the room is becoming a confessional. Things have been engineered, definitions are unclear, fingers are pointing, and people start getting desperate and scared. Can we bring the dogs back?
Your database can be an ace in the hole, but not when it is full of holes. It is definitely not a poker game. You can’t bluff. I don’t care how many muffins you’ve got.
Data requires discipline and experience, at least if you want to make it useful. If your only ambition was to check the “we’ve got data box”, you need to be re-evaluating your priorities. Why are you putting on a show? I doubt you are creating a music video… although, I have met quite a few CTOs and CEOs who have made me wonder.
Don’t lose hope, but quit the DIY! And for Pete’s sake don’t think that buying some fancy off-the-shelf visualization tool is going to solve your problems. The glasses may be cool, but they are still just a show. To think otherwise… you must be Gaga.
You can get help. You just need to prioritize it. Early! And stay patient. If you are willing to give the time and priority to getting the right help, it shouldn’t break the bank. Far from it — this is a basic analytic discipline. If only disciplined analysts were easy to find…
There are some of us out there. Just be sure to find one you can trust. If they start adjusting the lighting, contorting your data, or asking you to put on masks — you’ve been played. Fold fast and live to the next hand. Thanks for reading!
