Why Do So Many People Struggle With Internalised Homophobia?

What is internalised homophobia and why do so many people (myself included) struggle with it so much.

Photo by Adrian Swancar on Unsplash

Despite the progress we have seen in terms of LGBTQI+ rights, the fact is that, in a heteronormative society within which, according to the 2021 census, only 3.2% of people are not straight, identifying as LGBTQI+ is still very much ‘going against the norm’, as we are reminded of, all the time…

When you think about marriage, you think of husband and wife.

When you think about grandparents, you think of grandma and grandad.

All these long held ideas of what constitutes love - a man and a woman - at the forefront of our minds.

‘Heteronormative gender roles are heavily enforced in mainstream society, so it took me over a decade to begin resisting the cultural context in which I was praised for being an obedient daughter, trained to aspire to be a submissive wife in a heterosexual marriage, and shamed by for attempting to view myself as a sexual being with agency.’

Not only are people having to navigate their sexuality but, when they come out, comments such as ‘who is the man/the woman in the relationship?’ only serve to add a whole other dimension to…