13 Reasons The Goonies Would Make A Great Analytic Team
Warning: The Following Article May Involve A Truffle Shuffle
Reason #1 — Pirates
At Corsair’s, we love a good pirate story. Being pirates, defeating pirates, who cares? It is all just awesome. Any team willing to take on or be pirates is an analytic team worth hiring… unbiased truth! Wink.
Reason #2 — It All Starts With Data
Richard Wang is the most unfortunate name ever given to anyone, real or fictional. So it is no wonder he used a nickname and since “short round” was already taken — why not go with “Data”? To be honest, he was a bit more of a “Gadget”. He even wore the trench coat. But then every analytic team knows without a doubt that all good things start with “Data”.
Reason #3 — Interpretation
Data needs to be translated, well not the Goonies’ Data — he spoke English, mostly. But analytic teams need to be adept and sometimes creative in translating and interpreting data and information. Enter Ralph “Mouth”, I mean Corey Feldman, actually Clarke Devereaux… seriously? I never realized how unimportant these kids names really were.
Mouth was a very ‘creative’ translator. Old Spanish, modern Spanish, sheet music — he translated all of it. If you want to follow that up with ‘poorly’, you have a valid point. But you also have to admit, he got the job done.
Reason #4— Segmentation
Not only was Mouth the teams master translator. He also showed a knack for on the fly analysis and segmentation. When it comes data and insight, it is very important to organize and/or separate information and insights into the proper buckets. Or drawers…
Reason #5 — Goonies Never Say Die
Every great team needs a great leader. Someone who can inspire and create vision. Enter “Mikey” Walsh, ringleader of the Goonies.
Mikey’s story is the heart of the movie from the moment he encounters “One-Eyed Willy” until he is dramatically carried from the field by the entire Notre Dame… wait sorry. I got a bit confused there.
Mikey gives many impassioned speeches during the film. He encourages his team to press on. From his famous “Goonies never say die!” to that touching soliloquy at the base of Mount Doom — “Come, Mr. Frodo! I can’t carry it for you, but I can carry you.” Oops, sorry.
You get the idea. Every team needs a great leader, analytic teams especially.
Reason #6 — Every Team Needs A Great Story Teller
Lawrence “Chunk” Cohen is an incredible story teller. This is something every great analytic team needs. If you are inclined to think “he made most of them up”, you weren’t paying attention.
Maybe he never met Michael Jackson, but can we be sure. He got the Fratelli’s story right. His confessions were hysterical and likely true. And while the police may not have believed his Gremlin story, he lived in Steven Spielberg’s universe, that boy was speaking truth.
His stories are entertaining, they are honest, and they come from the heart. How do you find a better story teller for any team?
Reason #7 — Analytic Teams Need To Be Succinct
Two words — Truffle Shuffle
Reason #8— Brand Is Important, Innovation More So
Remember that scene when young George W. Bush climbs on the little girls bike to chase after his younger brother… sorry. Brandon “Brand” Walsh plays two important roles on this team. First, he is arguably the Goonie (ok, extended Goonie) most concerned with appearances. Brand has a brand… gee, think that was intended?
But Brand is also the character who gives us innovation. Whether the target of a chest expander turned handcuffs, or the acquirer of available transport — even Brand knows when to adjust priority.
Reason #9 — Targeted Technology
The fact that someone actually built an infographic of Data’s inventions speaks volumes. Pinchers of Peril, Punch Out, Bully Blinders, Slick Shoes, and the sadly-cut-from-the-movie Octo-blaster were all incredibly awesome and targeted technology.
Data understood, no one technology can rule them all. Maybe he got that from Mikey…
He could also teach Brand a few things on branding. Every tool had a name!
Reason #10 — Repairing Broken Models
Things break. At many companies, analyst spend a lot of time repairing broken models. Data models, statistical models, business models, the list goes on. I even once repaired a model created by a Greek colleague who had left the company… thankfully, it was quite a bit different than the Goonies.
Reason #11 — Chester Copperpot, One-Eyed Willie, & The Fratellis
I have written at length about adversarial relationships and mentors. The Goonies give us both in abundance. Each represents a learning opportunity that the boys embrace fully, although often not willingly. Any team who can do that, can plan my castle onslaught any day.
Reason #12 — Learning From History
I am also a huge fan of learning from history. If Sloth can do it, anyone can?
Struggling for the refence? Think Captain Blood or maybe Errol Flynn? I think he also learned from The Electric Company, which may also count as history these days…
Reason #13 — Relationships
Goonies are all about relationships. Their movie was all about relationships. Relationships are huge in analytics. Big stories require perspective, leverage, and networks. No one ever solved the world’s problems locked in the Fratelli’s basement… well, actually if you use that as an opportunity to build a relationship with an unexpected friend…
Great analytic teams know that relationships are a requirement.
Thanks for reading! Here is my favorite scene from the movie.
Comment on your below! Looking to add this story to your collection?
