The Tale of Brave Sir Robin
Big Data the Holy Grail
Monty Python’s Tale of Sir Robin begins with a song:
Bravely bold Sir Robin, rode forth from Camelot,
He was not afraid to die, Oh Brave Sir Robin,
He was not at all afraid to be killed in nasty ways
Brave, brave, brave, brave Sir Robin.He was not in the least bit scared to be mashed into a pulp
Or to have his eyes gouged out and his elbows broken;
To have his kneecaps split and his body burned away
And his limbs all hacked and mangled, brave Sir Robin.
His head smashed in, and his heart cut out,
And his liver removed, and his bowels unplugged,
And his nostrils raped, and his bottom burned off,
And his penis split … and his …ROBIN: Er, That’s … That’s enough music for a while, lads. It Looks as though like there’s dirty work afoot.
SINGERS: Brave, Sir Rob …
ROBIN: Shut up.
Admittedly, you aren’t likely to see too many analysts in the corporate world arrive with a giant chicken on their shield.
Though I have encountered many with an utter lack of courage. Oddly enough, they are often accompanied by a band of supporters who boldly sing their praises. Truth be told, Sir Robin’s Tale was the first that struck me for its analogy to the world of analytics and big data.
In Monty Python’s Tale, Robin encounters a challenge that appears no worse than those faced by Arthur. Robin engages in a bit dialogue, but promptly extracts himself from the situation. His band of minstrels, quite used to this occurrence, promptly leap back into song.
SINGERS: Brave Sir Robin ran away.
ROBIN: I didn’t.
SINGERS: Bravely ran away, away.
ROBIN: No, no, no.
SINGERS: When danger reared its ugly head,
He bravely turned his tail and fled
Yes, Brave Sir Robin turned about
And gallantly he chickened out
Bravely taking to his feet
He beat a very brave retreat
Bravest of the brave Sir Robin
Petrified of being dead
Soiled his pants then brave Sir Robin
Turned away and fled.
The average tenure of so many analysts is a mere 18 months!
In Big Data terms, this is just enough time to show up, hire in the team you left at your last stop, milk a few more paychecks, and leave before anyone knows whether you created any real value.
Of all the Tales, to me Sir Robin’s is the most reprehensible. Analysts, like knights, must have courage. Far too many Arthurs, and other corporate leaders, too readily bring in people like Robin. This is despite the fact that most resumes make it easy to see who the Robins are.
Jumping from one assignment to the next and running at the first sign of trouble, often works pretty well for Robin and his band of minstrels. The shortage of analysts and growth of Big Data allow Sir Robin to move from one quest to the next. For their part, his band of minstrels just follow along…
though occasionally when things get tight…
VOICE OVER: In the frozen land of Nador, they were forced to eat Robin’s minstrels … And there was much rejoicing …
