No Expressions

A Short Story of Voiceless Tutelage

I’m Laura.

It’s safe to say, I fit the norms. A Regular teen girl with a passion for art. I have a loving boyfriend, who is more of a clumsy person himself. But I loved him for who he was. I can’t be choosy. Either I had to accept him for who he was, or be a cat lady for the rest of my life.

I’m sure I picked the right choice.

Ben & I moved to China, soon after he got the offer he’d been waiting for. The highest post at a China’s leading Technology company. We both knew how long distance relationships were. We weren’t ready to risk it. With a little compromise, and an approval from both of our parents, we set sail to the future that we were destined to create.

Almost every girl in this country, grew up having the fantasies of a “perfect boyfriend”. The standards and expectations were quite high. If not, the least every girl did was dream about the perfect wedding. Well, Ben was everything I imagined him not to be. Messy, Flustered, and a very short attention span. My random tantrums would go right above his head. Literally.

But we somehow, loved each other. We learnt to compromise. Although, I always had the urge to yell at him whenever I could, I held myself back.

Because I valued our relationship more than my ego.

Years passed. I somehow got along with his habits. And so did he, with mine.

We weren’t married. Due to certain circumstances, we remained as a couple for quite long. The things I would do for him were appreciated. But Never Told. You guessed it right. The worst kind. Expressionless.

It would often put me in a dilemma. Did he genuinely like me? Or did he not?

It had been 3 years. I asked Ben to meet me by the bridge, at our neighborhood park. Little did he know, that today was our 3-Year-Anniversary. But of course, I knew he would forget. As always.

He showed up in a casual shirt, with shorts. He greeted me with excitement. It wasn’t because it was our anniversary. It was because, he couldn’t wait to show me his new shirt. A typical Homer Simpson shirt with a doughnut in his hand.

He realized something was wrong. He knew I wasn’t happy.

“what’s wrong?” He asked, with a sense of curiosity in his tone.

“what’s today? Don’t you remember?” I replied.

“Today is our 3 year anniversary. And you fucking forgot” I exclaimed as I fled the scene with tears rolling down from my eyes.

He tried to chase me down and stop me. But nothing could stop me that day. I ran home, locked myself in the toilet, and cried myself to sleep.

The next day, I was woken up to the terrible news that Ben was no more. It was a case of mugging that had gone wrong. A huge part of my life filled with nothing but his void. I missed his existence. His habits. His clumsiness. I never knew that I would miss something, that I hated the most. I couldn’t get over him. I browsed through his social accounts, again and again, trying to relive the memories that were lost.

I began to see a pattern. A girl named Sophie liked every one of his photos. Commented on each and every one of them. Who was she? After further research, I found out, that she was exactly his type. Long brown hair, thick glasses, a fair woman with a beautiful face.

Goddamn, she was gorgeous.

But Ben never mentioned anything about her to me at all. Strange. What could she possibly want from Ben? I knew most of his friends, but this was someone who I had no knowledge of.

I guess I have to dig further. I began to think. I wanted to find out. Was Ben cheating on me?

Laptop. Laptop. Laptop. Yes.

I guess I could login & Go through his messages. To see who she really was. I was extremely curious. Was I wrong all along? Was Ben really expressionless? Or was it just that I wasn’t the right one for him?

I powered his laptop on.

This is the end of Part 1. I hope you liked the story. If you did, please tap the little green heart on the right! Any or little appreciation is most welcome.