You Are Too Fucking Fat

A Note From Your Inner Saboteur

R. Nash
R. Nash
Jun 10, 2018 · 3 min read

Haven’t you figured it out yet? I want the best for you, mostly. That’s why I keep bringing this up. The ideas, the plans, the suggestions are all because I know that you are miserable, and honestly, you should be. I see the look in your eyes when you imagine sliding into slick skinnies and a tailored coat. I notice when you peek in the mirror hoping something has changed since you smashed that brownie last night. When you think you look good but maybe not. I didn’t ask for this responsibility but I am willing to help you be your best self.

You need to do something about your self-esteem. When I look at you, I see someone who doesn’t believe in themselves. You complain about your height, your weight and your wardrobe, but you don’t do anything to change it. You seem to think that the rest of the world should feel bad because you allowed your body to triple in size. We all know the perils of junk food, but you continued to abuse your body in a way that will be difficult to repair.

I know you want to go out more, but you don’t like to get dressed. The least you could do is your version of dressed, right? The last time we went out you said that people were staring. I can’t believe you didn’t realize why. Your confidence is so low that you are not able to get beyond your insecurities. All you need to do is get started, literally, that is their motto. I can’t make this shit up. Improving your self-esteem starts with you changing your body. It’s only 45 pounds and then you will be good to go. 8 weeks, some new clothes, and a haircut and we will have your Tinder profile smokin bro!

You know how they say, when you look good, you feel good right? I promise you that it is totally true because I feel good almost all the time.

It would be good if you quit going to the Starbucks and the Chic-Fil-A for breakfast and lunch. I mean, come on man we talked about this. You are making this hard for me. It will help with the front flap, and I’m almost positive your skin will improve.

Remember how you wanted that new job? You need to look a little neater and slimmer and maybe they will see more than a semi-smart fat guy.

Interrupt the Pattern

Save yourself. I know you are the part of me that thinks you keep me safe, but I don’t need you anymore. When the rush of negativity takes over, I acknowledge the feeling but take back control with facts. I get that I am not comfortable with my body but I will not let my imagination get out of control. People don’t care what I look like. Even if they do, fuck ’em. It’s all in my head. Most of my issues are all in your head.

I see the fix. I can get out of this situation. I still want the best for me.

Creative Conduct

An inclusive contemporary publication providing all the information you ever wanted but never knew you needed. An amalgamation of topics suiting all readers.

R. Nash

Written by

R. Nash

Writer, Teacher, Friend. Everyday guy with extraordinary hopes!

Creative Conduct

An inclusive contemporary publication providing all the information you ever wanted but never knew you needed. An amalgamation of topics suiting all readers.

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