The New — and More Effective — Pattern for Female Leaders
The First Step of Being a Leader Is Seeing Yourself as a Leader
It’s 2022, and women still don’t think of themselves as leaders. I know, because for a long time I didn’t either. The reality is we are leaders, and our numbers and strength grow every year.
Research done by American Express found that in 2019 women-owned businesses represented 42% of all U.S. businesses compared to only 4.6% in 1972. And 87% of global mid-market companies have at least one woman in a senior management role in 2020. This is incredible, notable progress.
When I was growing up, there weren’t a lot of women in leadership. It was assumed leaders were male and the media only reinforced that message. Because of this, it took me several decades before I saw myself as a leader, even though I started my company 10 years ago and had been in several leadership roles before that.
Part of the reason why I didn’t see myself as a leader is because of the characteristics that have been historically associated with leadership. However, with the rise of women in leadership, there has also been a shift in what it means to be a leader. Gone are the days of dominant managers barking orders and expecting the team to just follow, no questions asked. With a new focus on transformational leadership — defined by CIO as a leadership style in which leaders encourage, inspire and motivate employees to innovate and create change that will help grow and shape the future success of the company — it’s become clear the tide is changing.
There are new patterns in leadership, ones that focus on empathy, motivation, and inspiration. These are traits most women innately possess. The first step to changing the role of women in leadership is for women to recognize this for themselves.
So, what is leadership? Depends who you ask, but I love the definition presented by Kevin Kruse in Forbes: “Leadership is a process of social influence which maximizes efforts of others towards achievement of a goal.”
It’s obvious when a woman is trying to fit a role or personality type that isn’t authentic to her. In fact, at Ad Astra, we see many female founders and entrepreneurs seeking investment and during some of their presentations, something seems off. And usually, it’s inauthenticity.
Interestingly and for obvious reasons, investors are usually quite good at reading a person’s authenticity. The women pretending to be something they’re not: aggressive, over-confident, competitive, self reliant. Traits usually associated with successful males. And when it’s not true to who they are, it’s apparent. And usually, if an investor feels something is off, it means no funding. It’s no surprise then that female entrepreneurs are getting so little of the pot.
Forbes reports, “Women entrepreneurs in the U.S. ultimately raised about $22 billion in 2020, representing 14.4% of a record $156 billion… That’s down from 16.9% of total funding for U.S. startups in 2019, when women-founded startups raised a comparable amount of a smaller $130 billion of overall deployed capital.”
We formed Ad Astra to shine a light on leadership characteristics that may be overlooked and undervalued because they don’t match what exists today. I believe there is a way to change the patterns in leadership, which is to create new patterns. which is to create new patterns and new molds for female leaders.
For me personally, this realization has helped me embrace my own authentic leadership style — which is now a blend of the masculine traits I began my career with and also the feminine traits that I myself undervalued.
Here’s how to recognize the leader within you.
Lead Authentically.
This is the most important part of leadership. Trying to lead a team following anyone else’s style or pattern will lead to failure. Be true to yourself and your strengths. The first step to leading authentically is to truly know yourself. Sounds obvious but in practice, it can be difficult. “Being who you are and being comfortable with that are keys for today’s successful leader,” Inc. writes.
Being authentic also means inviting feedback from others. Ask trusted colleagues and friends for feedback in an effort to hone your leadership style. Honest feedback will help you define your authentic style and keep you on track.
Recognize & Embrace Your Feminine Traits
Empathy and humility are traditionally female traits, and they’re also incredibly important characteristics when it comes to leadership. Harvard Business Review puts it well, “Throughout history, we have told women that they are too kind and caring to be leaders, but the notion that someone who is not kind and caring can lead effectively is at odds with reality.” Of course it’s at odds with reality — employees are absolutely more loyal and productive when they are inspired and cared for by their manager.
Maternal by nature, women are physiologically wired to be this type of leader. And in 2022, while we still face a national pandemic and new world of work, empathetic, kind, and caring leaders are who will succeed.
Quiet Leaders Are Powerful Leaders
Being in charge doesn’t mean you need to be loud. I really like how Entrepreneur puts it: “At the heart of [silent leaders] is a quiet confidence rather than arrogance or ego, and a tendency to want to solve problems through collaboration, logical thought, and encouragement rather than through aggression or dominance. Silent leaders are compassionate, understanding, open, and approachable and–most importantly–they command their team through earned respect rather than force of character.”
This type of humble and compassionate leadership propels many of today’s most effective leaders. The loud, masculine leadership style just simply isn’t as effective.
While there’s a long way to go, today there are more women in leadership roles than ever before. My daughter now has hundreds of role models that simply weren’t there 30 or 40 years ago, and I’m hopeful she can start to see herself as a leader much earlier than I did.
