The Northman was a trip. Literally. This movie is an acid trip. Well, technically, it's a mushroom trip. On that note, let's get a quick SPOILER ALERT out of the way. If you be a two-legged dog that hasn't watched this film yet, then escape this cave and come back when ye are a man.
What is The Northman?
This Scandinavian folk tale is Hamlet. Or, as a quick google search will confirm, Hamlet is based on this tale. Amleth, our protagonist, predates Hamlet as a prince of Denmark. So if you are familiar with Shakespeare or the Lion King, a full-on plot summary would be about as much of a waste of your time as it is mine. So let's not, eh? Okay, I can't get into some criticism without it, so let's speed-run this summary.
Story Time
Amleth starts as a young boy hanging out with his dad, Ethan Hawke. Big E is the King, and he takes his boy Amleth into some weird-ass cave where Willem Dafoe is hanging out. One of many eerily trippy scenes plays out as the King, and his son are worked into a rabid frenzy by Dafoe, the local shaman. These spiritual, fantastic scenes are just that fantastic. The audio work adds so much to the creepy factor in the music, sound, and vocal effects.
Back to the lecture at hand, Amleth, and King Hawke climb out of this cave after a ritual where the boy sheds his 'last tear.' Once outside, the King is straight-wrecked by a bunch of dudes in wolf's fur (this will be a theme). Upon the big reveal, we see that Fjolnir, the King's brother, has orchestrated the murder. Fjolnir orders his flock to bring him the head of Amleth. The young buck slices off some scumbags nose and slinks off to his house, which is so dumb. I know he's a scared little kid, but your uncle just killed your dad and demanded that you be killed. Don't you think your house might be the first place he looks? Never mind me, though.
Amleth survives, but before he escapes, he sees his mother carried off into the street, kicking and screaming as Fjolnir lays her down on the road. Little Ammy steals a boat, promising to avenge his father and save his mother with each row.
Cut to the future. Amleth is a badass wolf warrior now. Another crazy trip has a shaman firing these dudes up before they slay a whole village. We see that Amleth is no sucker; this dude is yoked. So there we go, badass protagonist established.
A Brief Lore Detour
Join me for another quick aside, as this plot point is one of the significant differences in Robert Eggers' version of this tale. In the old myths, Amleth survived his father's murder and lived with his uncle and mother by pretending to be insane. It is later in life that his uncle calls for his death by sending him to Britain, and it is then that Amleth comes home for his revenge. It is apparent in the myths that Amleth navigates his hero's journey using his cunning rather than his might. While Eggers' version of the character is clever, his brute strength allows him to pursue his fate.
Back to the story, Amleth learns that the slaves his clan has taken in are being sent to an island up north. The former King Fjolnir has been cast out and now runs a much smaller plot of land. Amleth disguises himself as a slave and rides off to the island. He is, of course, selected to work closely with the family, where he sees his mother and two half-brothers by his uncle's side. Amleth meets Olga, a fellow slave with the powers of a witch. Played by Anya Taylor-Joy, Olga plays a more prominent role in this story than Amleth's lovers in the myth. She also works to solve some of the problems Amleth runs into with her witchcraft and cunning.
Nordic Power Couple
Amleth and Olga devise a plan to terrorize Fjolnir slowly before eventually killing him. As part of this plan, Amleth sneaks into his mother's room to tell her that he is alive and here to save her from her captor. There is a huge plot twist here as mama Gudrun destroys Amleth's life in a few quick sentences. She shows Amleth her brand, telling her son she was a slave to his father. She had no love for the man and was the one to orchestrate the murder from the beginning. To make matters more disgusting, she tells Amleth that she will become his queen if he kills his uncle and brothers. Then she open-mouth kissed the dude, and I did a legitimate spit take in the theater.
So Amleth says, 'fuck that noise,' and rushes out without his mother. He continues his spree and kills off his uncle's oldest son, which finally sets Fjolnir into a rage, murdering slaves on a whim until Amleth comes out of the shadows like a badass. Well, he loses the fight and gets captured. A flock of ravens flies into the barn he's being held in and cuts Amleth free.
Supernatural Sidekicks
Time for another sidebar. I've skipped over several instances of what we will call 'divine intervention' in this plot. This is mainly for brevity, but a movie review or essay should not serve as a replacement for the movie itself. So to keep it moving, I'll say this. There are several 'ex-Machina' moments where our hero is suddenly in the realm of the gods. The prophecy says that Amleth is fated to kill his uncle in a lake of fire, and the gods seem to guide him in that direction throughout the film.
He speaks to eyeless 'seers' (played by Bjork, no less), fights a zombie to acquire a sword, and is now being saved by ravens. The raven bit calls back to King Ethan Hawke, who I had way too much fun with earlier to provide a proper introduction.
Hawke's character in this movie is named 'King Aurvandil War-Raven. So now you probably get it. There are several scenes where ravens act oddly amongst the humans and often harass Fjolnir's household. If you aren't picking up what I'm laying down, the ravens are the spirit of Hawke here to aid his son.
And Now, The Rest of the Story
So the ravens free Amleth, and he has another acid trip with a valkyrie taking his dead ass to Valhalla. When he wakes up, he finds out that it was actually Olga who saved his very much alive ass and is now looking for some hot tub lovin'. The two bang it out, and Amleth is reminded of something else that was foretold. He would have to choose between protecting his kin and having his vengeance.
Olga convinces him they can escape their fate, and the two lovers steal a boat captained for Fjolnir's dead son. As they sail off into the sunset for a happily ever after, Amleth kisses a wound on Olga's neck and is again granted a vision of twin children, one becoming the future monarch. Olga confirms that she is indeed pregnant. Believing that Fjolnir will not rest until Amleth dies, he abandons his love on the boat, swimming back while ordering the ship's captain to take Olga to safety.
An Epic Ending?
At last, we are at the final battle. Remember when I said this would be quick? I blame you.
We get a faithful retelling of Obi-Wan vs. Anakin on Mustafar. But seriously, this sword fight on the peak of an active volcano is pretty damn cool. Even if both dudes are naked. Look, you probably think this is relatively dumb, and honestly, I did, too, when I saw it. However, I would bet that this 'fight me naked to prove who the best man is' thing kind of holds up with that culture in that period.
After a dumb climax where Fjolnir wins the fight but stands there for what felt like 10 minutes waiting for Amleth to muster the strength to put together one final flurry, it ends in an epic stalemate as both men die. As he fades, Amleth hears the voice of his love. Olga tells him that the three of them are safe now, and Amleth can take his ride with the valkyrie this time.
Analysis of The Northman
Fin. Well, god damn, that was a lot. I've mentioned many aspects of this film that I enjoyed, but to restate them quickly, the film is beautiful. It is mostly dark (both in visuals and in theme), which helps make the CGI aspects look much more realistic. The music is excellent. It's creepy most of the time, but it sets the scenery well. Half of the CGI-boss fights with the gods were as good as they were because of the music and vocal effects.
The writing was good. These ancient dialogues, with their thick accents, can cover poorly delivered lines, so even when the lines aren't great, you can't tell because you aren't sure what Willem Dafoe just said anyway. The cast is excellent. I was surprised to see some big names that only get a little screen time in this movie. Skarsgard and Taylor-joy were solid in their roles, and I loved Claes Bang's work as Fjolnir.
No movie is perfect, and this one has its share of flaws like any other. While I enjoyed the story overall, it did feature a few plot conveniences and logic-defying decisions. I thought the ending would go a different route, with a potential lesson about how Amleth controlled his fate by choice. However, I came into this movie blind and had no idea of the source material until about 15 minutes in when I saw the uncle kill dad and steal mom. In hindsight, this ending fits the tragedies often told in that era, with the lessons to be learned from the hero's shortcomings.
Final Thoughts and Grade for The Northman
Overall, this film walks the line between an artistic think piece and a typical summer action flick. Eggers' directing style makes films a lot of fun to experience. I give this an 8/10. I enjoyed it and will probably buy this blu-ray eventually.
Now, begone dogs. Leave me to my studies, lest I call upon Fenrir to drink your blood on the battlefield. Wait, can I even say that? Is that going to mess up monetization?
Kev Nivek is an author, editor, and podcast host covering the NBA, the NFL, and college basketball. When he's not covering sports, he's writing short sci-fi horror, hiking in the hills, or firing up a steak on his state-of-the-art charcoal grill. You can find all of his projects here.
