Only Now Can I Dream Again
After a decade of disease, I’m writing a new chapter.
The nightmares came after I retired.
Deep in sleep, I would frequently find myself back at a company I left almost 40 years ago, my first job after journalism school at Boston University.
I felt lost, completely confused about what I was supposed to do there — similar to the iconic dream about arriving in class confronting a huge test for which one hadn’t studied. During these nightmares, I could manage to speak to my coworkers only in an impotent whisper. Often, I dreamt that I tried — and failed — to please the charismatic founder who eventually lost the firm and put a thousand people out of work in the mid-1990s.
I would wake up deeply frustrated and shaken.
Sure, I knew that retirees sometimes have a hard time adjusting to their “new” lives, and disturbing dreams could be a side effect. But my days were different from most who leave their work lives behind — and there was a reason I couldn’t get peace at night.
I had to heal.
When it all started falling apart.
Back in 2006, I cofounded a successful communications company. My friend and I mostly put together marketing programs for state departments of career…
