Regret Is a Waste of Time When You Can’t Change the Past
An epiphany about writing, regret, and foolish rumination.
REGRET (n) 1. A feeling of sorrow, disappointment, distress, or remorse about something that one wishes could be different. 2. A sense of loss and longing for someone or something gone or passed out of existence
My aunt Ruth often said…
I never regret anything I did — only what I didn’t do.
Ruth (and other much-older women) fill my head with what I have come to think of as my old lady “light bulbs” — terse but profound reminders that I trot out of storage to illuminate difficult moments.
Ruth was right. Our biggest regrets involve things we have failed to do in our lives.
Actions cause more pain in the short-term, but inactions are regretted more in the long run.
Regret after the fact is actually quite foolish.
If what you did was wrong or bad, dumb or unkind, misguided or spiteful, you don’t get a redo. The twenty-four book editors who rejected the first Harry Potter manuscript, the producers who turned away the Beatles….well, too bad. The best they can do is learn from it. And make a more informed choice…
