Seeing Each Moment Through Rose-Colored Glasses
Moments are all we have
Conversations with three much-loved friends of many years, shared over these last two days, have made me think and remember. To consider how fleeting time is and how precious each moment. So I have been trying to remember to be mindful and notice and appreciate. To notice as much beauty as possible. To re-frame my own attitudes as I respond to what happens around me so that I can glean the best from what I experience, and appreciate the humanity of those I am spending my moments with.
It was a back-and-forth kind of day today. Sun to start, with dark clouds scuttling in fairly quickly, so by the time I was seated with friends at the cafe with our Scrabble board set up, the rain was pouring down. And one game later, no more rain, but the strong sun beating down on the puddled parking lot. Our weather report simply says “Humid.” Indeed. Lots of thoughts flooding in right now, so I think I will try to write them down and figure out what it is that I am really thinking.
I felt very open today and softer in how I viewed the world. I play Scrabble with a group of ladies once a week.
We are all old ladies, as it happens. We have health challenges. We have financial challenges amongst us. We get crabby sometimes. We have a wealth of experiences collected among us, and eyes wide open to the vagaries and ugly things going on in the world. We have survived and learned a lot. But our time together is focused on taking care of ourselves as social animals. We chat, we tease, we joke, we play competitively but never in a cut-throat way. The richest thing is how much we laugh together.
Before I got to know some of the ladies well, their ways of behaving could rub me the wrong way. Before I discerned that one member, who has a rather dour resting face, was not being abrasive in her comments but was, if I listened without assumptions, expressing herself with very dry, dry wit and humor. Far from complaining, she was speaking with irony, sometimes sarcasm. Always astute in her observations. I have begun to appreciate her a lot. She makes me smile.
Another member, whom I judged at first as annoying, gradually revealed to my impatient self that she was often nervous, a bit anxious, and seemed to struggle with memory issues. That happens to some of us as we age. I began to see how lonely she was too, and how much she needs to be with other women and to keep her mind working with word games. I find my impatience with her occasional moments of mild, confused frustration, or her drifting off into slight inattention, is disappearing. As my attitude softens, I enjoy being with her more.
I want to stay as soft as possible. I want to be mindful that every single moment offers a choice in how we react to what is around us. I want to remember to choose the kinder option and to notice whatever there is that is positive in what the moment offers.
I held onto this frame of mind on the long drive home across town. Idiot drivers seemed to have lost their power to irritate me. I was calm rather than irate with those who were tailgating me (because I try to drive the posted speed limits). I caught myself laughing a little at those impatient souls who raced in and out of traffic, changing lanes repeatedly to get a bit further down the street only to stop at the same red light we all stopped for. This was very different behavior for me. Usually, I curse them. Loudly.
Today I found myself enjoying every curve in the road, the still green vistas, and stands of woods in the distance. I enjoyed finding and driving through a branch of my credit union I had never noticed before, getting a little cash so I could stop and get something to take home for our dinner. I noticed the play of light on the road as the sun and clouds danced around each other.
It feels so good to be this mellow. And there is mellow to be found in most moments, even the most challenging if we remember to breathe more slowly and notice. I want to choose this noticing much more frequently. It feels much better than the alternative. So I will work on it.
And now, in my head, I can hear John and Yoko singing, “All we are saying, is give Peace a chance.”
Yeah. I think I would like to try that.
Originally published on my other blog at writenow@wordpress.com
