What I’ve Learned At 70

With more age comes more wisdom….sort of

Photo of the 71-year-old author

Since writing “What I’ve Learned at 65”, I’ve added five more years and learned even more as in:

I’d rather be 65.

I still miss my old job like I miss the flu.

At 70, routine is king.

There’s a big difference between prostate and prostrate.

You spend way too much time on WebMD.

Any hair lost on the head seems to magically reappear on the back.

Bend over slowly or you might not get up.

If you always look up at the stars you may miss the dog poop at your feet.

It’s even odds whether you outlive your new hip.

Wine is now once again only for weekends.

Two beers is a party.

Aging works for wine and cheese but not necessarily for people.

Thanks to a failing memory, you can save big bucks on movie rentals.

You no longer have to ask for the senior’s discount.

The reason you need lots of fiber is now abundantly clear.

You can sleep sitting up on the sofa.