The Storm Before the Calm

Yes, I know how the saying really goes. But in my life, it has always been the opposite— the storm before the calm. All of the amazing things that have happened to me have happened in the same moment as some of the most tumultuous.

It’s as if the universe has to bring you to your knees before it can give you what you most desire. At least that’s how it’s been for me. I can go back in time and literally play this out.

I got my basketball scholarship after dropping out of high school and losing all of my previous offers. I was dead broke, working for minimum wage, and barely saw a way out. Yet somehow that year ended with me committing to a full scholarship worth about $40,000 a year.

I finally got full custody of my daughter after months — check that, years — of fighting. When it finally went to court, I was almost broken, back at my mother’s house, and scared as hell I would be told when I could and couldn’t see the most important person in my life. Then just like that, the judge signed those papers and the heaviest weight of my young life was lifted off my shoulders. The very next day I moved into a new apartment with my daughter and we’ve started a new and HAPPY life together.

And now another storm is brewing. I can feel it. I feel the walls closing in right now and I’m struggling to find a way out. But guess what, I’m not worried. I don’t feel any of the angst I felt during my previous bouts with bad weather. I know what’s happening. I know what the universe is trying to tell me. I know something incredible is about to happen and I’m focusing on that rather than the problems that seem so dyer.

I may have said this before, and if I did it’s worth mentioning again. I watched an interview with Oprah and she said “it’s OK to know.” She may not have said it exactly like that, but that’s how I remember it. And I’ve remembered it since watching that interview earlier this year.

In the midst of the storm, it’s OK to know calm is on the way.

As we stress over things that seem to matter more than life itself, it’s OK to know that if you are taking the right steps, all will be well. One way or another, the universe sorts itself out. It’s up to us to control this energy and not let it control us.

Thanks for reading :) My favourite quote of all time comes from John Milton. He says “The mind is its own place, and in itself can make a heaven of hell, a hell of heaven.” Words to live by if you ask me.

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You may also enjoy my novella THOUGHTS OF A FRACTURED SOUL, available here.