Mo Weekly #53

Astrology: Science or Fiction?

Astrology is a pseudoscience with more following than actual science. It presupposes the existence of a link between celestial bodies and human behaviour. Ludicrous? Maybe

The peculiar thing about astrology is its perceived precision; it always seems to have the reader figured out.

Some people attribute the accuracy to science, some attribute it to magic, Thor comes from a place where they are one and the same thing, some would claim that astrology is a load of rubbish and the accuracy is due to its use of general statements that apply to a majority of people. But is it?

In trying to understand what Astrology is about, I decided to use a few subjects and their astrological signs in a bid to find any correlation between the star sign traits and their actual traits.

Beyoncé: Goddess , 38, September 4- Virgo

According to Astrology.com, VIrgorian gals are

“ go-getters… the ones to watch when it comes to big business and the arts, and they’re particularly adept when it comes to combining the two”

It’s almost like they realised Beyoncé is a Virgo and kept that in mind while writing the article because:

“Female Virgos are many businesses’ secret weapons – in that they are usually the quiet, diligent workers who don’t create a lot of drama or project a ton of ego while they are elegantly and effortlessly wiping the floor with their competition”

But where is the lie?

Davido: Musician, 26, November 21- Scorpio

An excerpt from Cafeastrology perfectly describes the “shukura ki lo ko si o” crooner:

“Tirelessly hard-working, this man has a powerful work ethic which makes him an in-demand employee who’s liked and respected by his supervisors and fellow workers alike”

If there’s anything Davido has consistently shown, it’s that he is always on the move, working and grinding for the “kpa”.

A Scorpio true and true.

Donald Trump: President of the USA, 73 (allegedly), June 14- Gemini

lovetoknow states that:

“Gemini men have a dual nature that easily fluctuates from charming, light and lively to captivating, dark and mysterious. Either way, Gemini males will quickly capture your attention and draw you to them with their magnetic sex appeal”

Trump? Asides his evident magnetic sex appeal, everything else is questionable.

“…Gemini man can be superficial and gossipy and say things without even considering the accuracy of what they’re saying”

There you have it folks, Donald Trump is as Gemini as they come.

Seriously!:

“The sign of Gemini sign is often referred to as the child of the zodiac, and Gemini men really fill the bill. Just like a kid, Gemini men are happy and carefree as long as things are going their way. But, when things don’t go their way, they’ll quickly change their personality and become sulky or unruly”

He literally throws tantrums when things don’t go his way. Oh Trumpy, someone should hand that man a popsicle and stroke his beautiful tangerine head.

Eminem: Rapper, 46, October 17-Libra

Cosmopolitan says that “a Libra man is an expert communicator, always knowing the perfect thing to say in any situation to come off as diplomatic, tactful, and charismatic”.

And if there’s one thing we know for certain about Eminem, he knows words and he can use them. He is an expert wordsmith, wizard like with his command of words, definitely a Libra.

Exhibit A-

“I don’t gas my Mercedes after midnight, I treat it like a Mogwai

‘Cause it will turn into a Gremlin

And run over kids, women, and men – Vrinn-Vrinn!

Motor so big, you can fit a midget in his engine…….

…Eenie-meenie-miney-mo

Catch an Eskimo by his toe while he’s tryin’ to roll a snowball”

-Untitled by Eminem

lovetoknow states that a Libra man is emotionally balanced and they rarely lose their tempers. However Libra man Em has us bumping and nodding to the least emotionally balanced lyrics anyone could have ever come up with.

Exhibit B:

“You can’t run from me, Kim! It’s just us, nobody else

You’re only making this harder on yourself!

Ha-ha, gotcha! Go ahead, yell!

Here, I’ll scream with you, “Ah! Somebody help!”

Don’t you get it, bitch? No one can hear you!”

-Kim by Eminem

Yikes!

One could argue that his work may have no correlation with his life but this would be an argument in futility as he has repeatedly stated that he uses the adversity in his life to fuel his art.

Cosmo further states that a Libra man is :

“…definitely the guy you want to take home to meet the rents, and you’ll be confident they’ll love him”

Yes, they actually said “rents”.

The correlation between the actual traits and star sign traits of the above subjects go to show why a lot of people tend to believe in Astrology.

I mean, who wouldn’t? For example, They describe Arians as impulsive, good leaders who are dangerously determined. I read that and my brain only tells me that I am both determined and a good leader.

Science on the other hand is factual and practical, two things that human beings are not particularly fans of.

We consistently attribute our lack of understanding of certain phenomena to the existence of something beyond the ordinary. And there was a time when Astrology ruled civilisations so why not?

Is it Fiction? Is it Science? Is it Magic?

Who has all the answers? Thor?