Cuble
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Cuble

Mo Weekly #54

Cuble focuses on Lagos weather

Over the past 2 months, Lagosians have had to endure some extreme weather conditions. The weather has simply said peek-a-boo bitches; now you’re wet, now you burn… We’ve been treated to Mercurial heat closely followed by Amazonian downpour.

It almost makes one wonder whether someone brought their kid to work in Weather HQ and the little rascal wandered off and started flipping switches.

Cuble, over the past two weeks has randomly interacted with various Lagosians on their thoughts about the state of the weather. Here are a few of our favourite responses:

ÓWÀNBÉ:

For those that do not know, ówànbé is a Yoruba slang for party, but not just any type of party- a proper Yoruba party with ‘aunties’. A particularly enraged man we spoke to stated that so many people that throw these parties hold the rain, ie. consult with oracles to prevent the rain from obstructing their event. He his convinced that what we are experiencing is Mother Nature’s payback for the obstruction of the natural order of things.

SANWO OLU:

There was a group that were fully convinced that Governor Sanwo Olu was to blame for the weather. And when we asked the obvious “How?” We got the “get out of my side, I have told you how things are and you’re still questioning me” in less than friendly words.

GLOBAL WARMING:

An enlightened young woman attempted to lecture a few Cuble reps on the effects of Global warming and stated that it is the cause of the current state of the weather. They walked out on her mid-lecture.

DEPRESSION:

A WebMD enthusiast said “the weather is depressed… nature is sick of our mismanagement of earth and is currently experiencing mood swings” he suggested that the Lagos State Government mandate the planting of trees by every household and observe ‘Earth day’.

He proceeded to prove his point by pulling up the symptoms of depression on WebMD.

The weather shows no reasonable pattern to follow, it’s practically having mood swings. I become increasingly tempted to side with the WebMD enthusiast.

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Moyosore Sheriff Quadri

Moyosore Sheriff Quadri

{retired} Fiction. Poetry. Satire. Humour. Creative Non-Fiction. Master of none. Welcome to my thought journal.

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