Mo Weekly #30
Dreams are God’s ‘Jumanji’
The classic and recently reinvented story of Jumanji tells the story of a group of people that get sucked into a video game and have to live it out till they defeat the boss level.
Cuble has recently conducted some research in a non-existent science facility. Our scientists aver that they have uncovered the truth behind the action movies we star in when we are asleep.
Dr. Cain (Head of research at the totally made up Cuble science facility): During some random research, foundations of which I cannot tell you because I simply do not know, we discovered that God is stuck on a video game level and has been since the time of Noah …
…The need to defeat this level prompted the creation of more players….After the loss of earth to the flood in the time of Noah, a level God lost to devastating repercussions, the Lord knew that he couldn’t continue to go all in with his precious creation (earth) for sport. This prompted the creation of the dream technology…
Dr. Eve (Head of the blasphemy department at the totally made up Cuble science facility): The dream technology was a major breakthrough in heavenly science, the Father could compete with his players in virtual realms without consequences on His precious earth….it is pure genious if you ask me…
Dr. Judas (Head of the carrot-human symbiosis Laboratory): … yeah.. it’s pure genius …if He wins a level with a particular player He progresses to the next level but if he doesn’t, He simply can’t use that player for that game mode again… this explains why people seldomly have recurring dreams…this is how it was designed to work in theory…it remains only in theory because Our Father has been stuck on the same level for some time now…He has refused to use other animals, potential big hitters, because of his love for humanity …. I don’t get it, if I were God, I’d sell the humans out..
The Jumanji thesis is one in a long line of major breakthroughs the Cuble Science facility has had since its inception.
Our scientists are currently close to uncovering the brain abnormalities of members of the flat earth society.