Mo Weekly #44

FPL should be the standard for human behaviour

Pay attention, this is a highly educational piece.

The Fantasy Premier League is the Fantasy Premier league. If you do not know what it is then you are doing something very wrong. It is better than your favourite person. It is better than your favourite food. It is better than your favourite thing. It is better than your very existence.

FPL adds worth to the worthless, purpose to the purposeless. What exactly is it that you do to benefit those around you? Whatever it is, FPL does more.

What is the Fantasy Premier league all about?

FPL is a game in which participants assemble an imaginary team of real life footballers and score points based on those players’ actual statistical performance.

Now, if you’re a reader who is just finding out about FPL from the above paragraph, you are probably saying to yourself “is this what this deranged fella claims is better than my very existence?” . Answer – Yes.

The rationale behind the statement is quite simple; FPL contributes more to developing the people that play it than you do to improve whomever you may be having interactions with.

Below are some of the standards FPL has set that humans are light years away from attaining:

• FPL provides you with a modest budget with which to assemble a team of world beaters, this improves your compromise capabilities and all round reasoning skills. The greatest compromise you’ve probably had to make was splitting a pizza slice.
• FPL can serve as a distraction from your current troubles; a breather. You only succeed in calming your friends down after a handful of attempts.
• FPL is better than religion. There is literally no possible way anyone can misconstrue it provisions and go ammunition crazy. Unless you are a Manchester United fan of course.
• FPL is more consistent than your mother’s cooking.

The Cuble staff aspires to attain the algorithm’s lofty heights. You should too.