John and Yoko’s Bizarre ‘Bagism’ Briefing
Wait — why the hell did they put bags on their heads and troll reporters?
By Jeff Burger
On January 30, 1969, the Beatles gave their final public performance on a London rooftop. Less than two months later, on March 20, John Lennon and Yoko Ono married on the island of Gibraltar. And eleven days after that, the couple conducted a press conference in Vienna while wearing bags over their heads.
As Lennon later sang in “The Ballad of John and Yoko”: “Made a lightning trip to Vienna, eating chocolate cake in a bag / The newspapers said, ‘She’s gone to his head, they look just like two gurus in drag.’” But he wasn’t fazed by the questions from the reporters, who seemed not to take the event seriously. In fact, as Lennon subsequently told Rolling Stone editor Jann Wenner, the Vienna press conference was “the best thing we did in a bag together.”
“It was like a hotel press conference,” Lennon recalled. “We kept them out of the room. We came down the elevator in the bag, and we went in and we got comfortable, and they were all ushered in. It was a very strange scene because they’d never seen us before, or heard… Vienna is a pretty square place. A few people were saying, ‘C’mon, get out of the bags.’ And we wouldn’t let ’em see us. They all stood back, saying, ‘Is it really John and Yoko?’ and ‘What are you wearing, and why are you doing this?’ We said, ‘This is total communication with no prejudice.’ It was just great… And they never did see us.”
Lennon and Ono can be heard humming a waltz as the proceedings begin.
Unidentified Man: Everybody in, please.
John Lennon: Yes, [the questioning can start] as soon as they like. Normal procedure.
Yoko Ono: Any questions, please?
Unidentified Man: OK, could you please be so kind… when you have questions, ask them in English. John has been in Hamburg and he knows German a little but not too much.
Reporter: Will you come out?
Lennon: No.
Reporter: Why not?
Lennon: Because this is a bag event. Total communication.
Reporter: What is it?
Lennon: It’s total communication.
Reporter: Don’t you think it’s a little bit out of fashion, what you do?
Lennon: Do you think it’s a fashion to stay in a bag?
Reporter: What is it?
Lennon: It’s total communication.
Reporter: What is total communication? An invention of John Lennon and Yoko Ono, or is it —
Lennon: No, no, it exists, and we’re showing you one example of total communication whereby —
Reporter: Total immersion.
Lennon: Well, that’s your version.
Reporter: Are there holes in the bag?
Lennon: There’s a hole to get in and out.
Reporter: Have you got a bag with you?
Lennon: [Laughs] It depends what language we’re speaking.
Reporter: Cockney in this case.
Lennon: Cockney, I see. I don’t think so.
Reporter: Do you get hot in there?
Lennon: It’s not too hot yet, thank you.
Reporter: Would you like a drink?
Lennon: No, thank you.
Reporter: If you could change two things with your face, what would it be?
Lennon: I’ve no idea. Never thought of that.
Reporter: Do you think you’re beautiful?
Lennon: I’m quite content.
Reporter: What about your wife?
Lennon: I think she’s very beautiful.
Reporter: Thank you.
Yoko Ono: Thank you.
Reporter: Have you conceived a baby?
Lennon: I have no idea. I don’t think so.
Reporter: What is the name going to be of your child?
Lennon: I don’t want to speculate on the name, really. The Amsterdam thing was a joke, you know. [A reference to Lennon and Ono’s weeklong first “Bed-in for Peace,” which began five days after their March 20, 1969, wedding and served as their honeymoon. — Ed.]
Reporter: Could you change it to Vienna if it [the birth of a child] happens here?
Lennon: Yes, certainly. [Laughter] This is another peace protest, by the way.
Reporter: For peace, or against?
Lennon: For peace.
Reporter: You know, you’re in the city of love.
Lennon: Are we? Well, that’s beautiful. [To Yoko] We’re in the city of love.
Ono: Oh, that’s beautiful.
Reporter: This is the room where [inaudible].
Lennon: Really? Well, we’re highly honored.
Reporter: This is where the Habsburgs used to —
Lennon: Did they? Well, good luck to them.
Reporter: But not in a bag. Somebody said they didn’t know whether to pull up the drawbridge or lay on the red carpet.
Lennon: For who? Us or the Habsburgs?
Reporter: The Habsburgs had blue carpets.
Lennon: Ah, did they?
Reporter: What was the special reason for you to come to Vienna?
Lennon: One of the reasons was because we have a film we made [Rape] on TV tonight at 10:30, or something. And we thought we’d combine that by plugging the film a bit and also plugging peace a bit from this bag. This is a peace bag. Bag peace.
Ono: This is the first announcement to the world of bagism.
Lennon: Yes.
Ono: We decided to make an announcement of bagism in Vienna.
Reporter: By God, why?
Lennon: Because when we were in Amsterdam doing Bed Peace, halfway through the week we sort of realized a tag to put on what we were doing, which makes it easier for us and you to recognize what we’re doing, by calling it bagism. That means that if we have something to say or anybody has something to say, they can communicate from one room to another and not confuse you with what color your skin is, or how long your hair’s grown, or how many pimples you’ve got.
Reporter: How long is your hair?
Lennon: Aha! You have to guess! [Laughter] It’s not important. It’s only what I say that we’re here for.
Ono: We can still communicate.
Reporter: You’re not saying very much of interest.
Lennon: Well, you ask the questions and I’ll give you an answer, you know. If the questions are going to be banal, you’ll get banal answers.
Reporter: Are you gonna come out of the bag once?
Lennon: Not during this press conference, no.
[Laughter]
Reporter: Is there any modern Austrian author you know?
Lennon: No, I —
Reporter: Will you come out of the bag and show us your pimples?
Lennon: I don’t have any, actually. But if you’re gonna be interested in —
Reporter: Could you prove that to me, please?
Lennon: I don’t need to. Take my word for it.
Reporter: Could you give us a reception [sic] against pimples?
Lennon: A what?
Reporter: A reception.
Lennon: What’s a reception?
Reporter: A recipe.
Lennon: I’ve no idea. Eat good food.
Reporter: How could you prove that you are John Lennon?
Lennon: I don’t have to. I’m here just to talk about peace. It doesn’t matter who I am.
Reporter: Are you the ghost of John Lennon?
Lennon: Could be.
[Laughter]
Reporter: Would you come out if we gave you a Sacher-Torte [the hotel’s well-known chocolate cake]?
Lennon: We’re not coming out for the conference, no. But we’ll be out for chocolate cake later.
Reporter: Do you wish to make any statement about the film you are going to show tonight on Austrian television? What it is about, and why did you make it?
Ono: I think the film itself would explain. And I think that it’s very important that we are communicating now just by words. We are making a total communication without thinking, as John said, about what sort of face you have or what sort of taste you have in your clothes, et cetera. And those things usually disturb and lock the mind of people, and they can’t communicate totally.
Reporter: If you could send anybody to hell out of show business, who would it be?
Lennon: I wouldn’t send anybody there willingly.
Reporter: Unwillingly?
Lennon: I don’t know, you know. [Ono giggles] I really wouldn’t wish it on anybody.
Reporter: Is there any music you especially dislike?
Lennon: I like most music, practically all music. There’s some I prefer.
Reporter: Do you hear Viennese music?
Lennon: I’ve heard the waltzes, you know. I don’t think anybody hasn’t.
Reporter: I didn’t know you went to places where they played waltzes.
Lennon: I don’t have to. There’s a thing called radio invented a few years back.
Reporter: [Inaudible]
Lennon: That’s your own opinion, you know.
Reporter: It brought people like you to the fore.
Lennon: Yes, well, I mean, it brought you into the room.
Reporter: How about this statement Ringo Starr made that you’re [the Beatles] never going to appear in public again?
Lennon: Well, all the Beatles made that statement two years ago, but I can say I prefer the Beatles to come out of their bag, as it were, and do another tour. But I’ll have to talk to Ringo about that and see how he feels, you know.
Reporter: The opinion is not unique about this problem until now?
Lennon: How do you mean?
Reporter: I mean you’ve got the same opinion . . .
Lennon: Two years ago we had, and then a few months back . . . I think it was probably when Ringo was making a film that George, Paul, and I were discussing whether to come out on the road again, and we sort of were inclined to come out if we could get some groovy show together. Maybe take Apple on the road or something. And I think perhaps it was a lack of communication between us and Ringo there.
Reporter: Is it only Ringo who has the lack of communication?
Lennon: No, he was making a film, you know. He was in Twickenham [a town in southwest London], and we were just remixing the tracks we’d done. And we were just chatting, like, off-the-cuff. And so when they went to talk to Ringo, he hadn’t even been aware of the chat we’d had, you know.
Reporter: Is it true that you said once you would appear free in a concert in Vienna if it would be in the opera house?
Lennon: No, I never said I’d appear free anywhere yet.
Reporter: Is money so important?
Lennon: No, I didn’t say that.
Reporter: So what did you say?
Lennon: I said I’d never said I’d appear free anywhere yet.
Reporter: Would you appear for anything free?
Lennon: It depends what it was. The Beatles have done many charity shows. I appeared free in Amsterdam Hotel for peace, for seven days.
Reporter: There only was peace in the room, not outside.
Lennon: The peace was in our minds, really. I mean, we did seven days’ press conference for peace in which we donated one week of our two-week holiday for world peace. Now a lot of cynics have said, “Oh, it’s easy to sit in bed for seven days.” But I’d like some of them to try it, even if they do it for other reasons than world peace, and talk for seven days about peace. All we’re saying is give peace a chance.
Reporter: Could you give me an example for anything you’ve changed with this action?
Lennon: I couldn’t give you a concrete example, except for a few good cartoons that came out of it and a few good reactions from readers’ letters in England that I especially know about. Some old woman that said she’s had the best laugh of her life. Well, if the least we can do is give somebody a laugh, we’re willing to be the world’s clowns, because we think it’s a bit serious at the moment and a bit intellectual.
Reporter: You’re not willing to be the world’s clowns…
Lennon: We are willing to be the world’s clowns. That’s the least we can do, because everybody is talking about peace, but nobody does anything about it in a peaceful way.
Reporter: [Inaudible]
Lennon: If you donate your holiday instead of just sleeping with your wife and giggling, you might do something about it. I’m sure the local press would be just as interested in you relatively as they are in us two.
Reporter: Fortunately, they can see me.
Lennon: We weren’t seven days in a bag in Amsterdam. This is a compressed seven days. The Hilton Hotel was a bag in a way.
Reporter: What would you do if you would wake up one morning impotent?
Lennon: Masturbate.
Reporter: If you could send one gift to the pope, what would it be?
Lennon: Peace.
Reporter: What do you think about the Catholic Church?
Lennon: I think it’s as far from the truth as any other church. But I think what happened is, the message has been lost.
Reporter: What do you think about the queen?
Lennon: I don’t often think about her. I think it’s a hard life she has. Her way of communication is shaking hands, as is the presidents’ and premiers’ way. I don’t think it’s a very effective way of communicating to the public, because the public know less about the queen and the presidents than they do about us by staying in bed for seven days and what we think about.
Reporter: Do you think the queen should do that, also?
Lennon: If she believes in peace, I think she should do something positive about it.
Reporter: Will you sing us a song? [Ono begins to sing]
Excerpted from Lennon on Lennon: Conversations with John Lennon, edited by Jeff Burger. Published by Chicago Review Press. Available now from Amazon, Barnes & Noble and other fine retailers.
Top photo: Hulton Deutsch / Getty Images.
