Royally Rekt: Kate Middleton’s Photoshop Fail Needs a Knight in Shining Armor (With an Adobe Subscription)
Despite the royal family’s penchant for pristine appearances, even Scotland Yard can’t protect them from Photoshop fails. Case in point: Kate Middleton’s Mother’s Day portrait with her three kids, the first official picture of her released following her abdominal surgery on January 16th. Edits to the photo went about as smoothly as Mr. Bean tripping down a flight of stairs, leaving a trail of phantom limbs, questionable smiles, and enough blur to make a Monet seascape look like a high-definition documentary.
The firestorm of criticism wasn’t helped by news outlets ripping into the photo’s integrity harder than Jeff Ross at a Friars Club roast. No wonder the internet is having a field day and let’s be honest, you noticed it, too: One of those tiny rogue fingers looks as though it’s flipping us the bird. Photoshopped fail, or a royal toddler expressing his displeasure at the world talking about his mama? You decide.
Ever since Kate kept the details of her surgery under wraps and prolonged her absence from royal duties, the media has been buzzing, leaving the public to mind her business instead of their own. Conspiracy theories, some as wild as a royal coma or the one about the alien abduction, ran rampant. Releasing the photo, perhaps meant to be a soothing balm on the rumor mill, instead threw gasoline on the fire and cranked the speculation meter up to 11! This made the princess the target of online trolls and raised the ire of global news agencies, which pride themselves on honest reporting. For example, CNN now feels compelled to review all previous photos of William and Kate issued by Kensington Palace.
It’s unclear why the edited photo was released without thorough vetting, especially considering the scrutiny the royal family faces with every public appearance. Perhaps it was an oversight. The Yeoman Warders fell asleep? One can only imagine the courtiers have their hands full without needing to keep an eye on the royal cat in case it decides to take a joyride on the “enhance” button.
Days later Kate apologized on X (formerly known as Twitter) and admitted to making the edits herself.
The whole debacle begs the question: Does Kate Middleton not have a single intern who can tell Photoshop from a scepter? Because honey, I may just be a commoner, but I’m pretty sure anyone can master the basics of burning and dodging after watching a couple YouTube how-to videos.
Heck, I’ll be your personal Photoshop fairy godmother. Just throw in a couple of front-row seats to the next coronation and a backstage pass to meet the corgis. That’ll get you free edits for a year. I can even throw in a sunglass filter to disguise yourself if you really must break the fourth wall. Just sayin’, Kate. That’s a really good offer you shouldn’t refuse.
The Photoshop fails are hard to miss, even without the eagle eyes of Sky News’ data and forensics unit, who analyzed the metadata. From Princess Charlotte’s mysteriously disappearing sleeve to Prince Louis’ fingers that seem to be bordering on extinction, and the peculiar feathering around Kate’s hair, the photo was riddled with inconsistencies that left many scratching their crowns.
Listen, Kate, we’ve all been there, striving for saint-like perfection (just ask my Spanx, those things are basically medieval torture devices): accidentally Chiclet-white teeth in a photo edit, a blurred eye, maybe even an extra thumb. But hey, let’s not be too harsh. You’ve got more crowns than a sovereign jewelry store, but that doesn’t mean you can’t brush up on your Photoshop skills like the rest of us mere mortals. How about taking a night class at the community college? Or a session of Skillshare? Udemy anyone? The internet is teeming with influencers promising to turn your editing game from meh to viral sensation.
Kate was just trying to maintain that royal sheen, it seems. But in the process, the image itself — along with the palace’s credibility — became a bit tarnished thanks to those unfortunate keystrokes.
Regardless, it’s a reminder that even the most meticulously planned photo ops can go awry, especially in the age of digital media where every pixel is scrutinized. Here’s hoping Kate learns a valuable lesson: Sometimes the internet is less forgiving than a royal carriage with no shock absorbers. If not, well, at least we’ll have endless memes to keep us entertained until the next royal snafu.
In any case, Kate, if a Photoshop classroom in a book is too much of a beast given your busy diary, at least there’s still Lightroom. Because it’s simpler, foolproof, and the raw file remains untouched. Unlike, ahem, a certain Mother’s Day portrait we all know and love.
#PrincessofFails
