How to Break the Habit of “All-or-Nothing” Thinking
This cognitive distortion could be making your life worse.
We like to think we’re rational creatures. After all, we’ve been bought up in a sophisticated social environment that prepares us for the world ahead. We go to school, take exams, and learn from the intelligent teachers around us.
We seem well-equipped for the future.
But we’re not always. Especially because each of us holds a set of biases and preconceptions. These influence the world we perceive, how we act, and what we consider normal.
Unfortunately, cognitive distortions are deeply entrenched in the things we were taught and the world we grew up in. This error is a difficult habit to break. It could affect our preconceptions, and make us miserable.
One entrenched distortion is all-or-nothing thinking. Without realizing it, we often adopt this negative way of thinking:
- At school, we’re told we either pass or fail. Our performance is labeled as either better or worse than last time.
- We’re told to be as productive as possible, otherwise we’re considered lazy.
- We use superlatives when things go wrong. “I always screw this up,” “this always happens” or “nobody will ever like me.”